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MY FIRST 100K AT 22, and why I'm kind of sad about it (STORY TIME)
Hi! First of all if you find this story too long or too boring, you can skip until the end for some possible way you might help our country in these trying times Second, sorry sa papalit palit ko from English and Tagalog, this is just what I’m comfortable with kahit minsan wrong grammar din naman. Base sa title naisip niyo na siguro na story time to, and it is, pero let me just say kung bakit ko to ishare. Ever since nag start ako magwork hindi ako ganun kaopen sa financials ko, hindi naman ako madamot I just want to keep it private for the sake na di masabihan na mayabang, or mahirap, depende kung sino kausap ko. So ang solution lang na nakita ko is dito sa reddit, where I can keep it anonymous. ANYWAY. Hi. I’m a 22 years old CPA currently living in Marikina and working in Makati, and I want to tell you the story on how I made my first 100k in the hopes that I can inspire my fellow young people to start their own financial journey. It was November 2018, START OF MY CORPORATE LIFE I finished college back in May, studied for the board exam and luckily passed in October. Straight after passing the board, I applied to be an auditor for a firm in Makati. I started in November. My salary at that time was 19k, at first I was ecstatic because before this I was used to a 1k per week allowance + money I make on the side sa mga raket na naiisip ko nung college, so 19k a month was HUGE for me. Pero unfortunately, nahulog ako sa patibong ng lifestyle inflation (the more you make, the more you spend), I started eating out with my friends more, I started buying more shit, I started traveling. So for the next few months yung 19k a month na sweldo ko napupunta sa transpo, food, family, and leisure. TOO MUCH LEISURE. To the point na every end ng cut off siomai with rice nalang kinakain ko sa labas ng office namin, zero balance talaga si atm natin. Ang source lang ng ipon ko at that time ay yung Coop ng company na sinalihan ko, every cutoff auto debitna yun ng 800 pesos, so 1,600 a month, pero bulag ako sa ipon na to since di ko din naman siya pwede withdrawihin pa and wala akong balak sana until magresign ako, it would be a pleasant surprise once I resign in a few years. It was June 2019, MY FIRST INVESTING MISTAKE Everything changed nung June 2019, it was our first salary increase from 19 to 21k and we received our first ever bonus (nakareceive ako ng 13th month noon pero prorated to only 2 months since November ako nagstart and ginastos ko yon para sa Christmas celebration naming family). Yung nareceive kong bonus nung June is 13k. So syempre nung umpisa excited ako, 13k ganun ganun lang, di ko naman sweldo yon so parang libreng pera siya sa isip ko. PERO I was saved by my coworker, na nagsuggest na gusto niya magbukas ng COL Financial account gamit yung bonus na yon. At that time I was already thinking about starting with my investments, I’ve been interested in doing it for years nung college pa simula nung napagaralan namin yung Law of Compounding Interest. A short interlude: Law of Compounding Interest is a mathematical concept. Wala kang kailangan bantayan dito kasi it works on its own. Basically it means the earlier you start, the more you earn in the future. May complicated formula to pero here’s a simple concept para madaling intindihin. Lets say right now, at 20 years old, nag pasok ka ng ONE (1) PESO EVERY MONTH sa isang investment na kumikita ng 7% ANNUALLY, after 30 years at 50 years old ka na, yung 360 pesos investment na yon magiging P1,177.06 na. PERO kung naghintay ka ng 5 years at nag start ka ng 25 years old, by 50 years old yung 360 mo magiging P788.47 lang. TIME VALUE OF MONEY guys, the earlier you start, the more you earn. Ofcourse itong analogy na to is very gross simplification ng concept talaga, this is just to give you an idea of what the law of compounding interest can do. BACK TO THE STORY JUNE 2019 PA DIN. Lunch break that same day nagprint kami gamit company printer ng COL forms (wag niyo sasabihin sa boss ko), and nagmartsa kami papuntang Makati office nila na walking distance lang sa work ko. And that was the start of my financial journey, dahil lang sa isang usapang tropa sa office. Pero this also led to my first financial mistake. Imagine niyo ko, since I was a child favorite ko Jollibee, paglabas ko ng bahay namin may Jollibee, pag dating ko sa office bago pumasok ng building may Jollibee, maglakad ka lang ng onti sigurado may makikita ka ulit na Jollibee. So san ko pinasok yung pera ko? SA JOLLIBEE. FUCK. I just thought na since it’s a well known company and its one of the premium stocks, it’s a good place to start my investment. WRONG. Nagpasok ako ng 10k sa investment na yon, the rest is mutual fund. And in a week I already lost 1k. So bilang nooby investor, nag pull out ako. Natakot ako eh. That was my first mistake, investing without research. Pero dahil sa experience na yon, it started my 1 month long, grad school thesis level, research on the know-hows of the stock market and other investments in general. It was August 2019, RULES ARE SET After a month I received another bonus, this time it was health and another mid year bonus (thank you Lord), ang total na nareceive ko that time is almost 20k, pero at that time din madaming gastos kasi pinapagawa yung bahay namin, so I chose to help them with that bonus hanggang sa ang natira nalang sakin ay 4k. After a month of research, I learned about the stock market, I had a basic idea about technical analysis, fundamental analysis, I learned more about mutual funds and other investment options like MP2, VUL, REITs (welcome to the Philippines), and other investment opportunities. Again, basic stuff lang on some, a bit more stuff on others, pero the point is I’m more confident with my investments and continuous pa din ang learnings, but the most important thing I learned is EMERGENCY FUND. I always knew I needed to save first before investing, siguro nadala lang ako ng excitement kaya napainvest agad ako when the opportunity arose. In hindsight, thankful ako sa failed investment ko with JFC kasi kung di nangyari yon I wouldn’t have the motivation to learn more about these things. So the rules were set, yung around 12k na natitira ko sa COL account, di ko na winithdraw, in fact pinasok ko siya lahat sa bond fund muna, which is a safer investment. The idea was that I’ll keep it in a safe investment hanggang mabuild ko yung emergency fund ko before going for the riskier options. I know taboo to sa ibang tao kasi dapat EF muna bago invest, but you’ll just have to forgive me on this one. Aside from the 4k from my bonus, I also set as a rule na magtatabi ako ng 5k every month, no excuses, minimum 5k. I started making a budget, I downloaded an app called “Money Lover”, dun naset ko yung budget plans ko and recurring transactions to remind me kung ano mga dapat itabi ko every month. So every month the formula is (SALARY – 5K MANDATORY – RECURRING TRANSACTIONS (FAMILY, FOOD, TRANSPO, NETFLIX SPOTIFY) = WHATEVER THE FUCK I WANT MONEY), and it worked. It was not easy but it worked. Dahil sa app na yon and from my own initiative to discipline myself, nakapagtabi ako ng 5k a month and even more. Discipline is key nga talaga. It was October 2019, MY FIRST EVER LOAN At this point on track pa din ako sa budget ko. For a rundown of my current “assets”, meron akong 12k sa COL na di naman masyadong tumataas, bond fund lang siya afterall, and 19k in cash on hand and in bank (5k a month + 4k bonus). Pero surprise surprise motherfucker, magsstart na yung busy season. For y’all non-accounting people, starting around September to November, audit starts for most companies para sa BIR and SEC deadlines around April/May ng next year. During these days extended na yung work hours naming mga auditor, puyatan na minsan alas sais na ng umaga ako makakauwi and I have to be at work at 9am, so san yung tulog ko dun kung bbyahe pa ko pa Marikina. So I decided na magdodorm na ko and found a few workmates to join me, pero kailangan naming magdown ng 9k isa isa for advances and deposit. That problem is nagcommit na ko na hinding hindi magagalaw yung EF ko kahit ano mangyari, and since kilala ko yung sarili ko, alam kong if I break that rule once, I’ll break it more times after, kaya pinigilan ko yung sarili ko. I considered borrowing sa parents ko, or sa mga kaibigan ko, pero I ended up choosing to borrow from the company coop na sinalihan ko. May special loan sila noon dahil malapit na yung Christmas, Chrismas Loan yung tawag, obviously. Essentially, they charge 5% interest with 6 months to pay and to make the loan worth my while, I chose to borrow more than I needed. I ended up borrowing 36k just so I have more money na hindi restricted na restricted like my EF. I know I had to pay interest pero it was worth it kasi naging magmadali yung budget ko after non since aside from EF, I barely had extra money before. And ta-da, just like that I paid 9k to the landlord and put the rest of the money in a “semi-restricted” fund na reserved for emergency pa din, but not as emergency ng EF ko. The plan is to use it for Christma, so I did pero di ko inubos. After December passed and may natira pa, ang plan nalang ay pangrefill ko siya ng onti sa mababawas sa sweldo ko every cutoff hanggang binabayaran yung loan. It was end of February 2020, A GLOBAL THREAT Ever since DecembeJanuary ata naririnig ko na yung balita about the virus and how it seemingly started in China. During those times I didn’t think anything of it hanggang sa nabalitaan ko na yung first case sa Pinas. In anticipation sa pwedeng mangyari dahil during February dumadami na yung cases sa ibang bansa, I decided to pull out my investments. If there is anything I will need extra funds for, it would be for a global threat such as a pandemic. So pinull out ko siya all of my 12k-ish na tumaas sana pero due to the virus medyo bumaba din yung bond funds, so I didn’t really earn much. A fast rundown ng financials ko at this time, Assets EF - 39,000 (5k x 7mos plus 4k bonus) From COL – 12,000 Liabilities Outstanding Loan – (12,000) Net Asset = 39,000 Seems good naman diba? It was March 12, LOCKDOWN I still remember how I was sitting in the office, there was a call for social distancing but we had to do a firm wide meeting so we did it via group call. Everyone in the office was in a meeting but we’re all just staring at our laptops listening to our bosses about their plans for the upcoming lockdown, which at that time was still merely a possibility until the president officially announced it hours later. And so I went home to Marikina that day and as of writing this, I haven’t been back to Makati since. It was March 20, DEEP DIVE The PSEi made its deepest dive since early 2010s, it went as far as 4,700, it was briefly on the 3k level the previous day. Seeing an advantage from the situation, I deposited 20k on my COL account. I know some people may be groaning from this decision, it’s a pandemic and we could use the money. But I planned for this, I made sure we had enough funds in case anything happens in our family during these times. Although admittedly, foolish as it is, I didn’t think this lockdown would last 5 fucking months. So the next trading day, I bought 12k worth of shares in an index fund hoping to ride the index back up when the whole thing calms down. I was intent on putting it in long term so even if the market dives deeper, it would be fine (Spoiler: Turns out I invested just in time before it goes up again). I put the rest of the money on a speculative stock that I’ve been eyeing for a while. It was May 1, DEBT FREE Starting May I decided to increase my monthly savings to 10k as I wasn’t going out anyway, and pledged 5k a month to my local foundation to help out in other communities as our community in Marikina is relatively more well off than others. At first the budget was hard as I still had to pay for my coop loan for 4 more cut off but that ended April 30. And since then I can save 10k, pledge 5k to our foundation, and use the rest to help out in our family expenses. Starting May 1, I was debt free. At this point I had EF – 41,000 (5k for 9 months + 4k bonus – 8k deposited to COL to make it 20k) COL - 23,000 (Starting with the initial 20k, index grew by around 20% at this point while the stock grew quite a bit too) Total Asset as of May 1, 2020 – 64,000 . . . It is July 26, HI THERE! Yesterday I had the chance to revisit my budget, I didn’t get the chance before because the client I’m auditing requires most of my time. Ngayon lang free day ko, thank God its Sunday. We’re 5 months into the lockdown and most of us were hit by the pandemic in different ways. I was lucky enough to be affected positively by the current events, at least financially. Emotionally and mentally is another story not fit for this subreddit. Right now, at July 26, 2020 I finally reached P100k EF – 66,000 (41k in May 1 + 25k for May, June, and first cutoff of July) COL – 40,000 (!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!) TOTAL ASSET – 106,000 as of writing. The massive spike in my COL balance surprised me as much as anyone might have. As stock market enthusiasts would know, the PSEi recently went on a bull run before going sideways along the 6k level, but this was only small compared to how much I earned in the speculative stock I invested in, which I already sold by the way. The stock went from almost 1 peso to around 3-4 pesos recently before it went back down to 2-3 pesos, if anyone is familiar with the recent speculative stocks you might know what I am talking about. And that’s how I achieved my first 100,000, pretty boring I know. Right now I feel proud of what I accomplished, if not for how I accomplished it. I wish it were otherwise but the biggest reason I made the P100k this early despite my expensive lifestyle earlier in the story is because the circumstances caused by the global pandemic ravaging the world right now gave me the chance to make it happen. As I finally achieved the feat I was aiming for earlier than I expected, I decided to stop saving for now. Aside from my personal and family expenses, I decided to pledge the rest of my salary to the pandemic response mission. There’s no lesson to my story, it’s pretty bland and I mostly did this for myself, but if you made it this far and want to help, you can donate to give2asia.org which is where I’ve been donating recently to reach other communities outside ours. Our earnings will grow again after the pandemic but some children might not. Of course, not everyone is well off during these times so I’m only addressing the people that have more than enough. THANK YOU FOR READING MY STORY! See you at P1 million? HAHAHAHA PS: I forgot that I still have coop contributions and I’ve been contributing 1,600 monthly. I ‘ve been contributing for 19.5 months since December 2018 and right now it’s at P31,200. So total is P137,200 apparently, unbelievable.
First things first. This post is simply my experience. It's how things worked for me. It is accurate info for the process I went through when I went to OTS in early 2019. It might not be 100% accurate now, and it almost certainly won't be 100% accurate in a few years. Pretty much everything you see online (especially on Reddit it seems) when it comes to OTS may not be true anymore. People that went through in like 2016 seem to like to hop online and talk with absolute certainty about how things in the Air Force work when, since they've gone through, the entire leadership has changed and so have many of the processes. At OTS they specifically warned us about getting information from Facebook and Reddit for this very reason. Reddit can be a good guide, but it's full of dated, anecdotal information. Now, that being said... On to the whole ENJJPT thing. What is ENJJPT? ENJJPT stand for Euro-NATO Joint Jet Pilot Training. It is an alternate pilot training path. Instead of going to UPT at Columbus, Vance, or Laughlin, you will go to UPT at Sheppard. ENJJPT is a NATO program so there are NATO IPs, NATO students, and NATO leadership. It's a lot of fun working with people from all over the world. The syllabus is largely the same from what I can tell. I believe ENJJPT has a bit more tactical/formation stuff, but I can't confirm that since I am not sure what the normal UPT syllabus is like. The most significant difference at ENJJPT is that everyone will track T-38s. If you want to track T-1s or UH-1s then ENJJPT is not the program for you. There is no track select. If you pass T-6s, you will fly T-38s. For a lot of people, this is the main appeal of ENJJPT. I'd be lying if I said I didn't see it as a huge perk. However, a common misconception is that everyone that goes to ENJJPT gets fighters on drop night. Currently (and this number fluctuates big time), 75% of ENJJPT grads get fighters. Most that don't get fighters seem to get either B-52s, C-130s, MC-130s, AC-130s, U-28s, but you could get assigned anything. I've seen people get E-3s and KC-135s too. While your chances of getting a fighter are probably higher at ENJJPT, it is definitely not guaranteed. How do I get to ENJJPT from OTS? OTS Application The process of getting into ENJJPT starts before you even get into OTS. Long story short, a board will select a member of your OTS class to go to ENJJPT. This board looks at things like AFOQT scores, PCSM, GPA, work/leadership history, etc. You don't need to just pass the AFOQT, you need to crush it. Interestingly, they were not interested in my actual PCSM score, but in my PCSM score at 201+ hours. So don't worry too much about "buying" a good PCSM score by accumulating flight hours. You'll want to have some flight hours, but you don't need to go into debt or anything to get 200 hours. I had 7 when I was selected. Nomination The first step is to be nominated by your flight instructor (the commissioned officer in charge of your class). They will take into account things like test scores, PT scores, leadership exercise scores, etc. However, in addition to this, you will have to be strated in the top 2 by your peers. The way it worked for us was each week was our flight mates would anonymously submit a top 3, bottom 3 of everyone in the flight. If you aren't in the top 3 for most of your flight mates, you cannot be nominated for ENJJPT. Here's the tricky part. Nominations were made like 2 weeks into OTS so every is still trying to get to know each other and figure out who is going to take what roles (they are in the polite/why are we here phase... haha) If you want to go to ENJJPT, you don't get to lie low. You need to be the one taking on multiple jobs, doing the things no one else wants to do, etc. Not only do you need to take on these things, but you need to do them well. People that take on jobs, but don't do them well, tend to get bottom 3 strats. Most importantly, you need your flight mates to like you. That means being social, hanging out in the dorms at night, and BEING NICE to everyone. Getting that top 2 is hard, because if people sense you are gunning for it, you probably won't get it. Welcome to the political side of the Air Force. It doesn't go away. Submitting your package If you are nominated you will submit a package to your training squadron (ie Mustangs, Cobras; not Det 12, 24TRS). This package will include your AFOQT, GPA, major, PCSM, test scores, leadership scores, a resume where you can state your accomplishments and special skills, and a one-page letter stating why you think you would be a good candidate for ENJJPT. Your training squadron will then review all the packages (can be up to 8) and select 2 to send up to the OTS squadron (Det 12, 24 TRS). The OTS squadron will then select 3 candidates to interview. Those 3 candidates will meet with the board. The board I'm not going to tell you too much about the board, or what they are looking for when it comes to specific answers. I feel like would compromise the integrity of the process. Not to mention the fact that how the board is conducted is based entirely off of who the board president is. Sorry. The board that interviewed me consisted of an O-5 and two O-6s. They were very nice, but the environment is quite intimidating. One thing to remember with Air Force boards, is that they are not like your average job interview. You should study for an Air Force board (I don't mean memorizing Air Force trivia.) That's pretty much all I'll say about the board. Selection Within about 3 days we were notified of the selection results. The squadron commander called me to his office and gave me the results in person. I was originally selected as the alternate (ie you're not going unless the primary drops out, gets DQ'd, etc.) We had a pretty good chat about careers, what made my application stand out, general OTS things, etc. I was somewhat disappointed, but I wasn't married to the idea of going to ENJJPT so I went on with my life. Some of the people that didn't make it (even the people that got out early on in the process), took it really hard. There was crying, complaining, talking about how they should have been the select, how they were a better pilot because they had more hours, etc. Don't be this person. It's a really bad look and can have repercussion beyond ENJJPT selection. About 2 weeks after I was selected as the alternate, I received a call from the squadron commander. He asked me if I was still interested in the ENJJPT position. Of course, I was. He notified me that they had a spot for and that I would be changed to a primary select. In essence, they had liked my package so much they went out and made an extra spot for me. This is extremely rare. I don't say that to brag, but I firmly believe that if I had left that one-on-one with the squadron commander and started crying or talking bad about the other applicants, I would not have been given the chance to be where I am today. Be professional ALWAYS. My package Who doesn't like a little compare and contrast??? Here are some of the highlights (and lowlights) of my package... Major: Business Finance GPA: 3.01 AFOQT: P94/N89/AA82/V89/Q68 PCSM: 65, max 93 (7 flight hours) OTS Test #1: 95/100 OTS GLP #1: 96/100 OTS GLP #2: 93/100 SPT (OTSMAN Test): 93/100 PT Test: 94/100 (don't remember my exact PFB score, I think it was about the same the official score) Other: I speak English, Tagalog, and Spanish. (Every OTS person here at ENJJPT seems to be at least bilingual). I had pretty significant leadership experience prior to OTS. Led teams of 20-30 for about 3 years prior, primary manager of about 3-5 million dollars. Worked in emergency services and law enforcement during college where I responded to emergencies, supervised large teams, and organized various events/law enforcement programs. I also had some I also had pretty significant volunteer experience. I coached a competitive adult volleyball team, managed humanitarian aid for my church at the regional level, etc. My tips for success/final thoughts If you are at OTS as a pilot select (or any select really) you are already living the dream. ENJJPT is an AWESOME program and I love being here, but it shouldn't be the "only option" in your mind. Rumor has it OTS has all of 8 ENJJPT slots per year. That's 8 people out of however many hundred pilots go through there each year. Five years from now (assuming all goes well), I'll be a USAF pilot, and so will all the other pilots in my OTS class. ENJJPT is NOT the only way to get a fighter. It's not even a guarantee that you will get a fighter. Just ask the ENJJPT grad that are flying AWACS. If you get ENJJPT, great! It's an awesome program. If you don't get ENJJPT, great! UPT is an awesome program. Don't be that guy crying at lunch because they didn't get ENJJPT. You're already a pilot in the USAF. You've already won the lottery. I love answering questions. So if you still have anything you want to know about ENJJPT, OTS, or life as a new LT, go ahead and ask away I'll do my best to answer them as honestly as I can. TL;DR - Getting into ENJJPT from OTS is hard. You must be nominated to apply, and ultimately selected by the board. I discuss my experience in detail, and give a summary of my application.
[Story] I left home at 17 as a near sighted kid without glasses, shoes, socks or even a shirt. Never looked back.
EDITWhether you upvote or downvote is up to you ofcourse- but lurking breaks my heart. Please drop a comment about what you thought as you read this. With over 1,500 views and only 22 comments- I'm a little put off. I still check this thread for updates months later, I have enjoyed reading every comment Hi there. My name is Leeland and this is going to be quite a story. I will be hyper linking things here and there- so you may want to read through once before getting distracted on these tangents. As stated in the title- things at home were rough:
No running water till I left home- A lot of people will ask if I am American at this point, but you'd be surprised at how often families in the south have a well they can't afford to fix. My childhood went by in blissful ignorance. We bathed one-two-three times a month in the Lake Shower stalls, washed our clothes by hand, and bought water or filled empty milk jugs in bathrooms at Walmart.
I like to interject humor in dark places so the reading isn't dry and hopeless- so if you just want the meat of the story skip the next two paragraphs-
My most embarrassing moment was my 10th grade year in high school. Like most impoverished families- we had an absurd amount of dogs and cats. The cats are outside cats. One morning before school as I was about to run up the long rocky path to my bus stop, I saw a tom cat marking his territory on my bike. Indignant, I kicked at him. (not violently mind you) Little did I know I'd taken the bike's place. The bus stop, being outdoors meant plenty of air circulation, which meant I didn't know I was doomed until I got onto the bus. The moment I sat down, the most pungent smell hit my nose. I realized within a few minutes of blowing it away from me and it returning that it was my pants that smelled of cat piss. Although I was not sitting with the other children, the smell filled the entire bus and it was't hard, I imagine to determine its source given the few students we picked up after me. I managed to bluff my way through 3 periods that day. In between each class I went to the bathroom trying to wash out the acrid smell. It ofcourse didn't work. I only managed to draw curious stares from people at the wet mark on my pants in the halls. Some may ask why I didn't bother to call family and ask for new pants, but you must remember- we are poor. When I turned 16 we didn't even use gas to teach me how to drive- much less would we be willing to spend gas on bringing someone pants. Plus my step dad......well. We'll get back to that. It was in 4th period, just after lunch that my teacher walked into the classroom. I was sitting toward the back, at a table shared with 3 others. The very moment he crossed the threshold he stopped, wrinkled his nose and proclaimed loudly: "Ugh. What's that smell? It smells....like a cat's liter box.." And pray tell, does my dear sweet Arts and Humanities teacher stop there? Oh no. He literally follows his nose to my table- where he stands in front of me and my 3 classmates, looking out past us. "it's coming from here...." It must have been at that point that he realized he was about the end someone's social life, because he dropped it quite promptly there. It was the most awkward moment I have ever had. Now let us continue
I had an abusive life. Let me first state here that my mother is a good woman- with unfortunately poor taste in men. My biological father is a dead beat I've only ever met once. My first step father turned out to be a liar and a child molester. Though we got rid of him early on- it messed my little brother (his real father) up psychologically- and he had to go to counselling for 3 years. Apparently I was molested as well, but I have no memory of it. Thank God. I got 1 brother and 1 sister in that short marriage. The 3rd and final 'father figure' in our home was a man who lived with his mother well into his 30's. We moved in with them, as my mother had no place to go. So realize here and now before you judge her too harshly- that if we left this place- finding a new place to live we could afford would be very difficult. Especially as a single mother who has 3 children.
The first few years were OK. But something changed as I turned 9 and then on, to this day I don't really understand it. Maybe he was always this way, but my innocent years shielded me from his ignorance. Being the spiteful man that he was- my step father would often accuse me of this or that. And truthfully- I was 95% of the time innocent of these accusations. Ofcourse I would deny them, but it's his word against mine. Often I would be given an ultimatum; "I'm not going to tell you what you did, because you always lie about it anyways, if you admit to what you did wrong, I will not punish you as badly, but if you lie I will make your punishment worse" Ofcourse I proclaimed innocence. And I paid for it dearly. He would practice 3 types of punishment. All of them included me being out of sight and mind for hours:
pull your pants down, remain bent over the couch (living room where everyone who walks by will see you) until I come to spank you. Sometimes I would be there for hours, scared of the lashes I didn't deserve. It was terror at first, humiliation hours later.
Stand in the corner of the cabinet that hasn't been dusted behind in literally 10 years where you can hardly breathe without getting dust in your lungs until I conveniently forget your there. I once stood in the corner for 6 hours.
You're grounded. This was the punishment I received most often. Being grounded at my home is basically a death sentence. You literally have less rights than a prisoner on death row. I lay in my bed (if you can call it that, thing was so old the fabric had been worn away years ago and I either choose to use the blanket for warmth or use it to protect my side against the springs that stuck out painfully.) until told my time was up. I cannot speak. I cannot read. I cannot even turn over because my 'room' was actually the living room where the TV was and by turning over I would be watching TV so if caught doing so I would be smacked in the face. I had to stay on my side, looking at the same peeling wall paper.....for up to two weeks at a time. I would be grounded so often that I began to notice patterns. If I was not told to get up the morning following my sentence, then I was going to spend at least 2 days, if not 2 than 4, if not 4 then 7. If I ever made it to an 8th day- I gave way to despair knowing that it would be another 6 days.
I tell you the truth, there is nothing in this world more depressing than knowing you've wasted your entire day, and that no matter what, when you wake up the next day, there is NOTHING to look forward to This was the closest I ever came to depression as a child and teen.
Have you ever seen hoarders? My step father's mother was the last surviving member of her 9 brothers and sisters. She couldn't bare to part with anything, and I can't really blame her, but being as poor as we were, it was cheaper to keep all of these things in the house, rather than put them in storage. Trying to make a 2 person home accommodate 7 people was bad enough. Imagine curtains crusted over with years of neglect and dust, boxes pile to ceiling tiles, which by the way were constantly falling and in need of repair. No matter my age I was very seldom ever allowed to leave the yard or house. We were never given any independence. Never allowed to cook our own food, to call friends, to visit friends or have friends over. These terrible circumstances created in me a very curious cocktail of Social Awkwardness. More on that soon.
Thankyou for the private messages and the comments on this post. The feedback affirms my decision to share, in hopes that my story will help someone out there struggling.
In addition to an aggressive step father, claustrophobic living conditions, a yearning for independence as I grew and a lack of basic resources that most people take for granted, our family also did without often.
For me- three meals a day was a foreign concept. I had 1 bowl of cereal for breakfast, and a bologna sandwich with a handful of lays chips for dinner. Without exaggeration that was almost entirely my diet growing up. Even when I entered my teens, a time for males where a lot of important growing occurs, I was severely underweight. Up until last year in fact, at the age of 24, I was 140 pounds....at 6'2. Money was rough not only because of the size of our family, (step father, Mother, step grandmother, 2 sisters and 1 brother + me + numerous animals that we had no business keeping the first place) money was an issue because my step father refused to work. My mother ended up becoming a truck driver so we could afford to pay for life's many needs, and this meant she was home rarely. This also meant that I had to endure more hardship without my mother who was often my only shield against the injustices I had to suffer. One of my most cherished memories of this time was at 15 years old. Grounded. Mom came home after two weeks on the road in the middle of the day. It had been dark in the living room all day. When she opened the door light flooded in and for a brief moment I felt free. Seeing me in the bed she knew immediately that I got into trouble again, but whether it was my fault or not, she knelt beside me, wiping the tears from my eyes. She told me; "*One day we'll leave this place Leeland, just put up with it a little longer I promise you." One day turned into years though, because when you're poor and have always been poor, and your parents before you and those before them were poor, life like this becomes a cycle. At 17 I was becoming a man. I was beginning to open my eyes and see the way other people my age lived. I was consumed with bitterness. SIDENOTEI also masked that bitterness quite well. I was President of the Writing club and Vice President of the Arts Honors Society, not a single friend at school knew what I suffered at home. Why do I have to deal with this? How do I escape? The truth is I had been offered a way out two years ago. (15) Let me tell you about Miss Billy Sue Kibbons. The following is an excerpt from a Facebook note I made a few years ago:
*"I want to be an artist" The boy had decided this with absolute certainty and naivety at the tender age of 8. It would be many years before he realized that 'artist' was too broad a term, that he still had much to learn, and that he had no idea what he was getting himself into. All he knew about the world of art at that time was Bob Ross and the Cabin that an ancient woman taught him in once a week. Billy Sue was her name and Leeland, even at his young age, thought that to be an odd name for a woman. It might have been a stroke of luck, fate, destiny or whatever you believe in that brought the two of them together, but Billy Sue would say it was God, in His infinite wisdom. That might have been the intention of the Teacher from Leeland's Elementary school who anonymously sponsored him to take these after school art lessons with Billy Sue. Even 14 years later to the time that Leeland was writing these words he never knew the Teacher's identity. This left him with no one to thank and he worked all the harder in hopes that this Teacher would one day hear of his success and know that she had made a difference. Years down the road Leeland would speculate just why he had been sponsored, knowing that while he was talented, he was no prodigy. Billy Sue taught Leeland many things about art, but none of that would have saved him the way only she and her husband, Jerry could. When Leeland had spent 5 months with Billy Sue she began taking him to church with her. Leeland found Christ not long afterward. (I do apologize is the C word offends anyone, this is not me shoving religion down your throat, this is just part of my journey) When Leeland was 10 years old he got his first allowance ever, working in Jerry's yard. Over the next 7 years he would learn neat landscaping techniques, the names of flowers and how to care for a lawnmower. These things are not meaningful to a normal child, but for Leeland, who grew up in a home that stifled independence and most learning, any excuse to get out of the house was treasured. Jerry and Billy Sue Kibbons provided Leeland with 2 days out of the week that he could leave the house. During Summer and Winter breaks this was most always the only time he would have outside his home.*
As you can see- these two people made an exceptional change in my life, and of all her students, I was the only one Mrs. Kibbons took such a special interest in. My tutor was very aware of my circumstances at home. I begged her not to call child services. I loved my mother, though she would constantly disprove of the way my mom raised me and the poor choices she sometimes made. When I was 15, she and her husband sat me down after a long day of landscaping and let me know- that if I were willing- they would allow me to move in with them. They just wanted to give me a stable environment at this crucial part of my high school life. I should have accepted. But when you are poor, and suddenly very aware of how poor you are- sometimes there is guilt associated with accepting help, even from those you know love you. And so I endured another 2 years of consistent abuse at home. My mother had been arguing with my step father a lot around this time. Mostly about me and how to appropriately deal with me. She had convinced him to at least put me to work doing chores, instead of wasting my time away in a bed for weeks at a time. I should have been grateful for such a break through, but wouldn't you know, he intended to take full advantage of this new rule. There are two examples of this type of punishment:
Many parts of our large yard were overgrown with baby Chestnut Oak trees. They have very long roots. Most of our soil was comprised of clay. My job? Pull up over 1,000 baby trees, bare handed, without tools until I was allowed to go to sleep. This punishment lasted the entire evening. I wept with anger that night at the injustice. I screamed at the top of my lungs at God, the fates, whatever. I was getting sick of my circumstances and my long long long long oh so long fuse was nearing it's end.
One day my step father walks into the house. Over many years of bad experiences with him coming home- I'd learned to shrink away into non existence in his presence in hopes that I would go unnoticed and unprovoked. I was not so lucky this day:
He came home. The first thing he says as I turn to my name being called: "You're being punished. I don't need to tell you why, you already know what you did. You know all that trash (please note this is a picture taken several years after the fact, the trash you're about to learn about was much much MUCH more) that's been piling up outside? The recycle center is giving everyone 3 days to throw out their trash for free. Get to work." Since we're poor, we burn our trash. Many things cannot be burned or are unsafe to burn. Examples include air freshener cans, glass, tin, copper, aluminum cans, etc etc. Ever since I could remember we'd never moved those trash piles. Easily 12+ years of garbage was piled at the burn pile and behind/beside the milkhouse (this picture shows what it looked like after I cleared all the trash. The rusty freezer was full of mosquito infested water and broken glass and rusty metals, imagine 6 of those full, that's how much garbage was piled around the milkhouse, and that was not even half of the total garbage.) My job was to bare handed, and with no help or tools, sort through all our accumulated garbage, sort it into 3 piles and then bag it (not double bag, safer for me and more expensive for him). After I bagged the extremely sharp glass and various other items, I had to wrap my hands around each bag for fear that it would split and then I'd be in trouble for wasting bags- and waddle the bag across the yard, up a hill, and up the long rocky drive way to a single care trailer. We all know how long one of those is right? I had to pile big black trash bags from end to end, 3 stacks high before I finally finished. Keep in mind it's the middle of the summer in the South. Snakes, venomous spiders, wasp and yellow jacket nests are very very real dangers when going through so much garbage that has been undisturbed for years. The entire time I am working, from morning to after it got too dark to see, he was verbally abusing me for 'taking my sweet time' as he saw it in his eyes. He assumed I wanted him to be late for the deadline. Paranoid, this guy. When I finally finished my work, more than 8 hours before the deadline, he was not home. He was at a friend's house, helping them with THEIR garbage. He comes home 6 hours later, takes the garbage off without a word, and when he returns later that night.... He still has the garbage. So what does he say to me? "I know you were taking your time with this punishment. Because of you I was late and couldn't take the trash off. Later I'm going to make you unload all the garbage off the trailer. For now I have to think of an appropriate way to punish you for making me late. Until I think of a punishment, you're going to lay in bed." These thoughts passed through my mind very quickly, please pardon the language:
Not only did I work my ass off for 3 fucking days. I did it all on the made up accusation that I did something wrong.
Not only did I do time for something I was likely innocent of, but this bastard harassed me the entire time I worked and then when I finally finish my job on time he has the nerve to blame me for his poor time management.
On top of ALL this- he's not only going to punish me for his mistakes, he's going to make me lay in the bed, suffering more, all the while looking forward to yet another punishment.
...... ..... .... "No." Step father turns around, after walking off expecting me to blindly obey as I always have. "What did you say??" I stand up. "I have the right to know what I did wrong in the first place to earn all of these punishments. This isn't fair." By this time my voice is shaking. I'm a very thin kid* (* I'm the one in blue.*) He's not quite as tall as me, but he is much stronger and better fed than me. For those interested, this is me today* But I'd had enough. So many years of injustice. I felt like Harry Potty finally giving the Dursely's a piece of my mind. He walked toward me. I held my ground. I'm 17. Nearly a man grown. It's time to make myself heard right? "You will do as your told. I do not have to explain myself to you. You always deny the things you do, it's a waste of my time!" "Well what about my time? Why should I give you so many days of my life for something I didn't even do? If I actually did something wrong then you can explain it to me. I won't budge from this spot until you TELL ME." I said those last two words forcefully. Not out of disrespect, but as a testament to my resolve. My step father has always been a hothead. He grabbed me by the shoulder and forced me outside. I wasn't wearing anything except gym shorts and my glasses. He shoves me outside. Every step he took put his face within inches of mine as he yelled at me: "I can't ever trust you, you're always lying..." etc etc (multiple curse words, but there's little point in elaborating.)
It's important to note that to this day I am unsure of what to make of the man. Part of me believes he was actually stupid enough to believe he was in the right. That's doesn't make it OK- but it makes it harder to loath him.
Up the side walk we go, he finally let's his rage come to a boil and instead of just yelling, now he's screaming at me to hit him. He wants an excuse to 'defend himself'- but I'm not quite that stupid. Even if I wanted to hit him, I don't have a violent bone in my body. I hate confrontation. I try to solve my problems with passionate speech, because I believe in the power of words. They held no power for me this day. Eventually he tries to goad me by attacking my beliefs. At this time he does not believe in a god, and while he's never said anything about my Sunday school lessons, this time he makes it known what a hypocrite he takes me for. "YOU CALL YOURSELF A CHRISTIAN, BUT YOU ALWAYS LIE, I CAN'T EVER TRUST A SINGLE WORD YOU SA-" For the first time in my life, I pulled a Gohan and yelled at him. "YOU DON'T KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT ME" I leaned forward as I yelled this. I made sure he could see the frustration and pent up rage in my eyes. He smacked my face. Hard. Glasses came off. They lay on the gravel mangled. Without even a brief pause, I turned from him, and from that life. Without shoes, or a shirt or even decent eye sight I walked away. Hot tears fell down my cheeks, and I don't even remember what he said. It was particularly offensive and I yell at him again without turning around: "FUCK YOU!" Things start to get better Knowing that if I didn't get off the road soon he was going to try to force me to come back home, I walked to the Youth Pastors house which was close by. I knocked on the door. He opened it to see a skinny, bare backed, barefoot teen crying uncontrollably that he'd sometimes played basketball with, with a huge red welt on his face. I looked at him through teary eyes hardly daring to think about the life altering decision I was making and asked to make a call. Mrs. Kibbons was there to pick me up within the hour. My mother was very upset for a few weeks after that. But she eventually came to terms with my moving out. Mr. and Mrs. Kibbons helped prepare me for College. I got into Campbellsville University where I got to meet and become friends with people from all over the world. (CU offers big scholarships for international students) For the first time in my life I was able to socialize with people freely, and I was able to commit to events, knowing that if I could get there myself- no one could tell me no. The independence was beautiful. Life was looking up for once. I thought. I was wrong. Sometimes the road to success is riddled with potholes. After 2 years and Campbellsville University I decided to transfer to IADT in Chicago. I intended to major in Animation, & CU only offered Fine Art. It was my first time in the big city. I enjoyed the city itself very very much When I transferred to IADT, I was told that with my 2 years of gen ed courses, I would be able to finish my Associates in Animation within 2 more years at IADT. After an entire year at IADT I had still not taken a single course for animation. Here I am, 3 years into my degree, and I don't know a thing about what I want to do for the rest of my life. I spoke to my program director out of frustration and concern. I was told then what I should have been told before enrolling at IADT:
Enrollment is at an all time low. The core classes you need to be in are not filling up. Until we can fill the classes >you need to take- you can't take them.
That's fine I guess, but here's the worm in my apple: My financial aid, scholarships and grants were not enough to cover tuition AND my student housing. If I wanted to use the student housing provided by the school (much cheaper than anything else) I would have to take out a parent plus loan. Fine. Do what you gotta do right? It gets worse. I need class X, Y and Z. They are not available this semester, so if I am to remain a full time student, aka, still qualify for the parent plus loan, which is the only way I am able to survive at this point, then I have to take more classes. I ended up enrolling in Drawing I. I already had this credit from my time at CU. I sat through an entire semester of remedial drawing for the chance to do their amateur animation final. It was styled in the way of William Kentridge, where you animate using charcoal and a camera and one sheet of paper. Our requirements were 50 frames, 2 objects needed to move, at least 2.5 seconds in duration and could be of anything. I decided to take this project seriously. This was going to be my first experience with animation, if I didn't give it everything- how would I know if I was going to enjoy it? We were given two weeks. We had a cramped classroom where we were expected to work shoulder to shoulder with other students, where the possibility of our tripods being budged, thus making the animation shakey and low quality was too common. I rejected this. I took my work to the cafeteria and worked all day and into the night. I marked my place with tape and continued everyday to learn this style. I didn't make my goal. My animation ended several hundred frames short of my goal. I expected everyone to go above and beyond the 50 frame limit. When I came to the final to present, I was astounded to see stick man animations crudely done. I do not mean to make my classmates sound bad- but you could tell, this is not what they wanted to do for the rest of their lives. I submitted an animation roughly 8-14 seconds long, with around 500 frames:
I knew then that this is what I want to do for the rest of my life. I was ready to commit many more years if it meant I could learn to be great. My mother's credit took a hit. Suddenly she could no longer take out the Parent Plus loan for me. I was evicted from student housing. An illegal Mexican family took me in. (I went to school with their son) Video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RupGqS7oFqY I lived in 3 different places that last year of college. I wish I could say I rose above these challenges and graduated. But suddenly I had rent to pay and I had to do it on minimum part time wage- Suddenly I was forced to commute 90 minutes in extreme weather to school and to work. The stress began to pile up, my grades crumbled under the weight. I was placed on academic probation for a semester. Then my grandmother fell terminally ill. She'd kept it a secret. Suddenly I find out she's road tripping from her home in Arizona to be with her daughter and grandchildren before the end. I was faced with a difficult decision. Finish my degree and miss my chance to be with my grandmother who could die any week, or take a semester off? I was with her when she died. I do not regret it. She like my mother made many mistakes in her life, but she always loved me, and I her. While I was away from school, my institute announced that they would be merging with Sanford Brown Not only did they lose accreditation, and would be dropping animation as a major, but they would also be closing their Chicago location once their current students graduated. I could finish my degree and graduate from a school that no longer exists.... or I could cut my losses. A Year to Think When I left for Chicago my mother finally worked up the courage to leave her relationship. She once said to me over the phone that it was not until I left for Chicago that she realized I had grown up. She had always reasoned with herself that by staying with him, she could save up enough money to give us the childhood we deserved. She decided to save what was left of her two daughters childhoods. And so it was that I decided to stay in Tennessee with my mom for a year, to work a few jobs, save some money and help out where I could. I was very concerned with my art practice and worried that this year off from school would come back to bite me. I looked for internships, but everything that had to do with animation requires that I be enrolled in school, even though I was willing to work for free if it meant finally learning.
I took to sitting at bus stops next to stop lights and practicing speed drawing by attempting to draw as much of a car or cars as I could before the lights turned green.
I also networked a lot. Working the drive through of a McDonalds and the carry out of a Papa Murphy's I met hundreds of people every week. I was amiable and looked for opportunities to let important facts about myself slip in hopes that someone, sometime would bite. One day a lady found out how much I loved art and recommended me to a tutor she went to weekly.
An art tutor? Heh, I have not had one of those for a long time, this could be a real treat. Understatement of the year. Turned out my Art tutor was none other than Marion Cook the father of Barry Cook who co-directed Walt Disney's Mulan in 1998. As you read these words I cannot begin to guess at what each of you are passionate about, but for me, pen on paper is my outlet. Be it words or lines- the ability to communicate is my greatest treasure. When I studied under Mr. Cook I saw dexterity of the hand, the likes of which you will rarely see in life and only when you know to look for it. He was so incredible it moved me to tears. Finally. I had a Master to teach me. I felt like Ang from Avatar, the Last Airbender. I can finally become GREAT. I was wrong. Again. I love my mother, as I have told you a few times, but she often makes decisions I disagree with. She was never very strict with my sisters, and much less so the youngest, as it is often the case with the babies of the family. My little sister was caught selling weed to the landlord's son.....by the landlord. (Please note I do not judge anyone that smokes, it's your life, I simply choose to not do such things) We were evicted. We had 30 days to find a new place to live. My other sister was in college and my brother was married a while ago and lives with his wife. So My mom found a place for herself and my youngest sister, but wouldn't you know it? There was no room for me. (new Boyfriend) I had to come up with a plan. I've always been a person to dream big and when I dream big I put my mind to it. I decided I was going to California. The animation Capital of the United States. I started a gofundme, told my predicament and included a short animation. No I will not link it, I did not create this post to panhandle I raised $2,000 in 1 month. Through a game called League of Legends I hit up a friend of mine in the Marines I'd known online for several years, though never in real life. He gave me the keys to his empty apartment and gave me 6 months of a rent free, bill free existence to get myself set up until he was deployed to Okinawa. I worked all sorts of jobs in my first year here. (San Diego) From Target to 7-11, from Telemarketer to Inrest Marketer, from Art tutor on a Military base to King of the Carryout at a Dominos. No job I came to learn, was too humble for me to work. Income is income. There's never an excuse to not be making money. I even got the balls to design a fancy resume in Ai, custom business cards and drew up a nice cover letter, and took myself door to door trying to find more work. The goal here was not to find a great job, that would have been an unexpected bonus. The goal was to build self confidence and build up a resistance to rejection. As a telemarketer I came up with a unique formula for networking. Most people told me to go die in a hole. Understandable, but once every few hundred calls a person would be astoundingly polite- I would ofcourse, without even being asked, place them on the DNC (national do not call list) Then after hours, I would call them back, inform them that I took the liberty of making sure my company could never disturb then again, then I coached them on how to avoid these calls in the future. Only then, if they were willing, did I venture to introduce myself and talk about my goals in California. I had very many interesting conversations with complete strangers. Most of them ended in empty hands but a heart full of affirmations. One call ended up changing my life. I had the fortune of grabbing the ear of someone who once owned a decently sized tech company in SoCal. He sold it ages ago, and now makes apps in his spare time. He discerned a bit about me in our phone call and asked me to lunch. Being the very trusting person I am thanks to a childhood of false accusations I agreed. The subject of competitive gaming came up during our conversation and he asked me why I didn't stream for additional revenue. I confessed I'd always wanted to, but with my background I'd never had that kind of chance. He asked me to send him a list of what I would need to stream. I sent him the cheapest list I could. He upgraded everything and Amazon'd me the parts. The only catch he said, was that I had to put my computer together myself. I learned a lot about computers that night. I began my stream with the knowledge that the average streamer gets 1,000-3,000 unique views and 100-250 follows in their first 12 months. I set my 12 month goal for 100,000 views and 2,000 follows. Today marks day 212 (month 7) and my stream is at 57,000 views and 2,400 follows. I do not use those number to brag, but to make a point. People put a lot of stock into averages. What are averages guys? It's the culmination of many many people's stats. Many people, but not you. Who you are, and what you can do is dependent only upon the amount effort you're willing to give. How BAD do you want it? When I worked my summer job on base as an art tutor, I worked 40 hour weeks there. I would walk 4 miles home in the Cali sun, shower, and walk to Dominos to work. When I got home I streamed for 5 hours every night with the goal of obtaining 10 follows a day. I treated my stream like a 3rd job. You've got to become obsessed with the idea of being successful. Pic Related What am I doing today? Currently I am looking for a second job. I am just barely self sustaining. This means I make enough money monthly to stay caught up on bills and pay for food. Never be satisfied for such things. I certainly am not. I'm working on my very first short film in spare time. Literally working on storyboards every week:
My mother was 17 when she held me in her arms thinking That this is the only one in the world that loves me. Oh My mother was young once too But her dreams did not come true and now as she watches me grow she sits and thinks on the things she hopes I will know "Oh son" she sighed, "your father never knew.. though living in the moment is never hard to do, after taking a chance you've got to follow through... cuz' Love is so much more than a heart that just won't mind, Every line being redrawn and crossed everytime.." Oh mother you've taught me so many things I've listened to your heart and the sad song it sings Fall far, far from the tree, that's what my mother Sang to me..
My fervent desire is to finish this in time for mother's day, or father's day if a devious mood takes me. There is a lot, that I do not know about Animation. I am able to teach myself some things, but I learned early on, that I learn best with a patient teacher with whom I can constantly ask questions. I need one of those the most. I'm currently trying to learn to drive. Transportation has been a major problem in my life, and at 25, I can no longer blame circumstance for having put it off for so long. The point of this post wasn't to give you the underdog story of how I magically became super successful, it was to show you that despite so many setbacks, and I only told you about half of them- I keep moving forward. Remember Rocky.
It's not about how hard you can hit, it's about how hard you can get hit, and keep moving forward, how >much you can take, and keep moving forward, that's how winning is done!
What can be more inspirational than a story about someone's life struggles, and how despite it all they still have the balls to look life in the eye and ask for more? I'm right there with you guys, never quit, never give up. Some people have pm'd me to ask what I'm good at- So I will shamelessly plug myself for a moment:
Graphic Design
Art tutoring
English Tutoring
Writing (creatively)
Public Speaking
Customer Relation/Service (even at the carryout of a Dominos, I average $5-$20 in tips a day because I own it. I know how to make the customer smile, and I reject the overused jargon my coworkers spout. I even take the time to learn conversational Hindi, Mandarin, Vietnamese, Spanish and Tagalog in an effort to connect with the many different cultures represented here in Mira Mesa.
Reddit's 40,000 character limit bugged Here is the rest of the post in the comment section I don't know what you guys are facing, but it begins one day at a time.
The best time to plant a tree was a hundred years ago- old African proverb
/end This was a pleasure typing out. If you'd like to get to know me- that can be done so here
Wikipedia and GamerGate : different languages, different takes
Okay, this is my first thread on this sub, hope it will be constructive. We had a discussion recently about the objectivity of the EN Wikipedia article on GamerGate. I pointed out the fact that every other language - except for Korean - seemed to push a different take than the english one. I decided to expand on that by translating the lede of most WP articles on GamerGate. Now, English is not my native language and translation toward a language other than your native one is usually not recommended. So any correction regarding grammar and syntax etc. will be appreciated. Please also take note that I only actually talk two languages besides of english : french (native) and swedish (3rd language). I can read some spanish, portuguese, norwegian and danish as they are close enough to those I talk, but not perfectly, so these will be half my reading comprehension and half help from Google Translate. The other languages will only be Google Translate with attempted grammasyntax corrections.
English
The Gamergate controversy concerns sexism in video game culture. It garnered significant public attention after August 2014, when several women within the video game industry, including game developers Zoe Quinn and Brianna Wu and feminist cultural critic Anita Sarkeesian, were subjected to a sustained campaign of misogynistic attacks. The campaign was coordinated in the online forums of Reddit, 4chan, and 8chan in an anonymous and amorphous movement that ultimately came to be represented by the Twitter hashtag #gamergate. The harassment included doxing, threats of rape, death threats and the threat of a mass shooting at a university speaking event. Gamergate has been described as a manifestation of a culture war over gaming culture diversification, artistic recognition and social criticism of video games, and the gamer social identity. Some of the people using the #gamergate hashtag have said their goal is to improve the ethical standards of video game journalism by opposing social criticism in video game reviews, which they say is the result of a conspiracy among feminists, progressives and social critics. Commentators from the Columbia Journalism Review, The Guardian, The Week, Vox, NPR's On the Media, Wired, Der Bund, and Inside Higher Ed, among others, have dismissed the ethical concerns that Gamergate have claimed as their focus as being broadly debunked, calling them trivial, based on conspiracy theories, unfounded in fact, or unrelated to actual issues of ethics in the industry.
French :
GamerGate controversy (usually written as #GamerGate due to its massive use as a hashtag on Twitter) is a serie of controversies born in august 2014. Gamergate proponents claim the goal of the movement is linked to journalism integrity/ethics, criticized in the past during the "Doritos Gate" controversy. Gamergate opponents criticize the misogyny in video game culture, particularly the harassment campaigns and verbal agressions being faced by women opposed to GamerGate. According to testimonies collected on the blog OneAngryGamer - which is proponent of the movement, some members of GamerGate have also faced harassment and doxxing.
Swedish :
Gamergate is a controversy related to misogyny in video games culture as well as unethical behaviour among journalists, that sprung in the USA in early August 2014. At that time, rumors developed regarding the personal relationships between game developer Zoe Quinn and a game journalist, while cultural critique Anita Sarkeesian faced attacks. Brianna Wu too, as well as several other women with ties in the video games industry, got dragged into the controversy. After this, several controversial discoveries were made in the video games journalism sphere. The GamerGate movement is leaderless and is first and foremost defined by the use of the #gamergate hashtag on Twitter.
Danish :
Gamergate is a controversy started in august 2014 and related to mysogyny in video games culture as well as unethical behaviours among journalists. The controversy was the center of particular attention due to the fact that threats and harassment has been a part of the social debate related to GamerGate.
(worth noting is that this article has been significantly changed just yesterday, after more than one month being untouched).
Norwegian (bokmål) :
Gamergate is a controverse in the video game sphere that started in august 2014 around a discussion regarding conflict of interest between a journalist and a game developer. The controversy has been particularly noticed/remarkable for the threats and harassment that's been bart of the social debate regarding GamerGate. The GamerGate discussion has led to two sides. OneGamergate-diskusjonen har vært delt i to leire. One claims that Gamergate confronts an industry that never bothered to define which ethical guidelines it should have, whether the other claims that the controversy is nothing but a try to drive women out of the video games industry.
Spanish :
Gamergate (also known as GamerGate, or #GamerGate to form a hashtag) is a movement related to the world of video games. Different mainstream media outlets echoed the accusations of media bias and lack of journalism ethics in the specialized press, as well as the harassment received by journalists, critics and notable developers taking part in the controversy, including death threats and bomb threats. In particular, the movement criticizes a conflict of interest linked to the relationship between developpers and journalists. Personalities alien to the video games world have taken part in the campaign for more integrity in the press, such as Julian Assange and Adam Baldwin. The controversy started with personal allegations regarding developper Zoe Quinn from her ex-boyfriend, Eron Gjoni. Gjoni accused Quinn of unappropriate acts justified by her career ambitions and will to get publicity for her recent game, Depression Quest, released on the Steam platform the 11th of august 2014. . This decleration was published on a blog, five days after the release of Depression Quest. Kotaku, the media outlet which employed Nathan Grayson (one of the people accused of being involved),investigated the declaration and concluded that there had been no conflict of interest. investigó las declaraciones llegando a la conclusión de que no hubo conflicto de interés. Following this event, some dissatisfaction grew in the video games community (gamers and players), linked to the journalism integrity of various well-known online publications. The concerns grew following the discovery that some journalists covered developers for whom they had donated money, including Zoe Quinn. Among the other topics of this controversy were the feeling that the gamer identity was under attack, due to the publication of a serie of articles declaring this identity as dead, as well as the increasing pressure that some social justice groups put on the creative process of developpers.
Portuguese :
GamerGate (sometimes preceded by a "#" (hashtag)) is a controversy linked to accusations of corruption and chauvinism in journalism and in the community of video games fans. The controversy started by the accusation that american indie game developer Zoe Quinn had had sentimental relationships with video games journalists. Subsequent events led to the creation of the movement and of the hashtag #GamerGate and #NotYourShield, with a focus on a debate regarding journalistic ethics and freedom of speech.
Scots:
Gamergate was born from the disillusion of consumers regarding unethical behaviours of game journalists.
Tagalog (Google Translate):
The Gamergate, also known as GamerGate, preceded by a "#" to produce a hashtag, is a scandal involving the world of video game. Various publications have relayed allegations of media bias and lack of ethics of journalists In particular, conflicts of interests were claimed not to be reported in spite of relationships between journalists and video games developers. Some personalities outside the world of video game like Adam Baldwin provided support for the campaign for the integrity of journalists.
Korean (Google Translate, unclear) :
Gamers Gate controversy (Gamergate), also known as the Queen's blood rushes (Quinnspiracy), is a debate on sexism in video game culture. It started in August 2014 as a debate about the large amount of female misogyny and sexism within the video game industry, as attacks were done to get the public's attention. The main target of these attacks are the female game developer Zoe Quinn, Brianna Wu, as well as cultural critic Anita Sarkeesian. These attacks took place mainly in the Twitter with the hashtag #gamergate, on reddit and 4chan, and were debated on online forums such as the 8chan imageboard. These attacks have disclosed personal information about the victim (personal whisk), included public rape and murder threats, such as shootings threats. The debate also became known as a hashtag as well as a leaderless movement (Gamergate movement).
Chinese (Google Translate, partly unclear) :
August 16, 2014, independent game developer Zoe Quinn's ex-boyfriend Eron Gjoni published an article on his blog and Penny Arcade website, accusing Zoe Quinn of sleeping with other people. One of the mentioned partners was game news site Kotaku's Nathan Grayson, who supposedly had an affair with Zoe Quinn. Since Zoe Quinn previously developed Depression Quest and released it on Steam, some players criticized it and were led to believe she received disproportionate media coverage in regards to the quality of the game. A number of players in the Eron Gjoni blog post constructed a conspiracy theory according to which Zoe Quinn used intimate relationships with games media professionals as a way to enhance the popularity of her works. Youtube user MundaneMatt on August 17 published a video, suggesting the abovementioned conspiracy theory. Zoe Quinn invoked the DMCA, using the Depression Quest screenshot so as to have YouTube remove the video. On August 18, Youtube user Internet Aristocrat published a video serie titled Quinnspiracy Theory, criticizing Zoe Quinn's use of nepotism to promote her game. On August 27, actor Adam Baldwin posted on Twitter a link to the video Quinnspiracy Theory, plus the '#GamerGate' hashtag. The tweet was was forwarded 244,000 times during the first week. "This incident brought Zoe Quinn suffered criticism and the game entered the game media and a wider range of Internet users, as well as the mass media's vision." (This I honestly have no Idea what the original text mean, so I leave it as is).
Serbian (Google Translate, surprisingly clear) :
Gejmergejt controversy (originally named Gamergate, or hashtag #gamergate) is a term linked to a controversy in the video games culture, that started in August 2014. It deals with issues of sexism and misogyny rooted in the so-called gaming communities, as well as the ethics of journalism in the Internet media dealing with games, especially the conflicts of interest between the gaming journalists and programmers. The controversy came to public attention due to the persistent campaign of harassment to which game programmer Zoe Quinn was subjected, after her ex-boyfriend released several charges on his blog in August 2014, including that she had "romantic relationship" with a journalist from Kotaku, which led to the thought that the relationship was the reason for positive media coverage of her game. Although this claim proved to be untrue, accusations against journalistic ethics have continued to grow, along with the charges of harassment and misogyny. Other topics include debates and changes and / or threats to the gaming identity as a result of ongoing maturation and diversification of the video game industry.
Russian (Google Translate) :
"Geymergeyt" (Eng. GamerGate) - is a long serie of scandals in the English-speaking press, which began in August 2014 and is still ongoing. It began with the investigation of a scandal of corruption in games journalism. The topic quickly changed to discuss misogyny and sexism in the culture of computer games. The name «GamerGate» is constructed similarly to other scandals names ending in «-gate» (the Watergate scandal, and others.), and gained popularity (primarily in the form of a hashtag #GamerGate) after a suggestion from actor Adam Baldwin.
I think we have them all. Now a few questions, obviously :
Do you think the english version to be the most objective?
If not, which language has your preference?
Do you think one of the versions has one or several points that should be added to the english version?
One can notice very different recollection of the events, depending on the language. Why, in your opinion? Is it a matter of culture? Of activism? Of sources? Does it simply depend on who gets to work on these?
Do you have any other thought regarding this comparison?
Hey, reddit. Help me help a 14 year old girl with stage 4 ovarian cancer.
Hello, reddit. I've been a lurker for more than a year and I am a regular poster at 2XC under throwaways. But anyway, my sister, who is 14, has a friend with stage 4 ovarian teratoma. The doctors diagnosed it last year and she's been going under chemo for the past 8 months. I've seen her facebook wall go from normal teenage rants to wall posts from friends saying "I'm sorry I couldn't visit you today". After four months and 6 sessions of chemotherapy later, they find more cysts in her ovary (I'm sorry I couldn't phrase this better) and she had to start the whole process all over again. She's been so positive through the whole ordeal, with status updates like, "CT Scans are #1 on my "Things I never want to do" List ;)", and posting typography photos with "Stand up to Cancer" or "Live as if you'll die tomorrow dream as if you'll live forever" on them. And when people ask her how she is, her usual comment is "awww.... I miss you all too!!!! I want to go back to school! Theres nothing to do in this cursed house!". These replies have started to decrease, until about two months ago, when she stopped replying altogether. So reddit, please help me help her. Or to help myself in a way because I just know I wouldn't be able to accept it if something happens to her. What can you suggest? I've saved up a few couple of bucks (around 22 dollars, which, in a third world country can buy a couple of books and toys) to get her something. Cards? Books? Dolls? I'm around 600 miles away from her (because I'm in college and she lives in the province) so I can't visit her everyday and she also stopped going to school so she doesn't have a lot of interaction with kids her age. (And when I was her age I watched a local film about dolls talking to each other when little girls sleep so I took out my dolls' limbs and hid them in different parts of the room just so they can't bind together and talk and murder me in my sleep and this is for a totally different post isn't it.) She's a little quiet but she's smart and she's bubbly. This is her facebook's about me: "I like reading and writing poems, sometimes playing online games... Anything random and weird is probably somehow related to me. I am a devil in disguse..LOL okay nevermind.... Dude, My imaginary friend thinks you have serious problems... hahaha : )" and her favorite quotations are: "Sarcasm is only one more service I offer." "Screw prince charming give me a guy with tattoos and a bad boy attitude." "I wanted to fly, I was a fool enough to try, good thing you were there to catch me at the time." "Do vegetarians eat animal crackers?" So you can kind of see her personality. Or please educate me on her sickness; I can't understand a lot of the medical terms so it would be great to have an Idiot's Guide. Is stage 4 ovarian teratoma still treatable? Is it common? Are there certain food she can't eat? Can she go out and play at all? Miracles <<<<<< Science. Maybe some advice: is there any way people can trace her facebook? You people can do crazy CSI shit and the last thing I would want would be to have random people stalking her. Any reply will mean the world to me. I've been having existential bouts again so maybe help me with that? I just can't imagine the pain of a little girl who has to answer with "getting tortured with needles and medicine Maam..." when people ask her how she is. And she's one of a few friends of my sister that I actually like. 14 year olds girls today make me weep for the future. I don't know how making hundreds of middle-aged men (and some girls, 2xc what up) would help, but I'll take anything I can get. I have seen very good things happen around here. ALRIGHT BITCHES EDIT TIME 1) I did not ask for money from you guys! I repeat, I did not ask for money from you guys, and again, I did not ask for money from you guys. Oh, and before I forget, I did not ask for money from you guys. I just wanted ideas because I already have my own money. :) 2) It's not MY sister! It's her friend. They have the same name and age so I couldn't imagine what that would be like, slowly losing her :( 3) I'm not with her right now because I am in college and she's in the province. 4) This is what I have so far: DVDs of funny movies A super soft blanket A USB of audio e-books lipgloss A fancy shmancy journal Hot cocoa Magazines And I was thinking of glamming her up for a photoshoot since I'm into photography and fashion. But it will be in September when I get home and that's too far from now :( Thanks for taking the time to reply, you guys! This is a picture of her in the hospital with a bunch of friends (I'm sorry little boy in the white sunglasses, but those need to go): http://imgur.com/6IHWy She was super chubby before and she had pink cheeks and no eyeglasses. It breaks my heart to see her like this. More proof: I'm sorry these are just facebook caps. I really have no access to her right now as I am not home in the province. Just check out the dates? If you still think this is a 5-month long elaborate plan to get your money then I think I pity you more. :) A http://imgur.com/QloAo.jpg Translation: Lauren, how are you? I'm good, my chemotherapy is about to be finished. B http://imgur.com/Tt2Eg.jpg Translation: Lauren, the grade school offered a mass for you. Can we come over tomorrow? C http://imgur.com/GxMYw.jpg Ugh it's cut. She says that she would be leaving for Cebu (a city in the Philippines) for her 3rd chemo. :) D http://imgur.com/HEoWp.jpg :D Translation: She's my cousin, Maam! How are you? Getting tortured with needles and medicine, Maam. :( Thank you everyone! EDIT: Thank you for the interest to help her out, but me and two other people are going to send her a card and some trinkets and that's enough. Help someone else out instead and spread that love! :) Here are updates about her: http://imgur.com/Lw0iM.jpg - the Tagalog words basically say that her friends miss her. If you want to email her something, send it to me at [email protected] I want to sift through the mail. I really don't want anyone sending her something rude. :) I really dont care if I'm giving my email out or that you people trace me. I've already given out too much anyway :)) I am just so overwhelmed by the goodness of this community. I've lurked for over a year and I thought the puns, the novelty accounts, the drawing requests, the movie references and the introduction of grooveshark and TV on VLC were the best things I've gotten from this. But they aren't. It's definitely the people. :) My faith in humanity has skyrocketed. I've done a lot of random acts of kindness in the past (I gave my batchmates and everyone who had a reason to be upset anonymous cards throughout high school so I know how amazing it feels to give. Now I'm the recipient of the goodness and it's nothing short of amazing). :)
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi! You both like ust. Stranger: As You: f18 You: u Stranger: M 20 Stranger: How are you? You: fine :) Stranger: So what are you doing here? Stranger: Good for you You: just want to talk to someone i guess Stranger: Same here. You: anonymously hahahah You: from ust? Stranger: Not You: oh You: same Stranger: From what school? You: im not from mnl btw You: uslt Stranger: Same here Stranger: Uslt? You: univ of saint louis tuguegarao Stranger: Ow You: its far hehe You: sorry Stranger: It's okay Stranger: You don't have to sorry about it Stranger: I'm from baguio You: ohhh Stranger: Yep You: what school? Stranger: I graduated in manila but im staying here bec. Of my sister, she's the one who's studying here You: ohh i see. so what r u doing rn? You: like occupation? Stranger: Laying on my bed You: hahahahah Stranger: I'm going to study again a short term course You: woah You: what course btw? Stranger: I will take culinary to have some certificate that i can use when i start working Stranger: Hrm You: wow u can cook. that's nice Stranger: Yes, just a little Stranger: Hbu? For sure you sre a senior high student You: fact You: g12 Stranger: What strand? You: abm Stranger: I see Stranger: What course sre you planning to take in college? You: will take accountancy soon, if God permits You: :) Stranger: Break a leg You: thanks! You: wait Stranger: What? You: can i ask a question? Stranger: Sure You: do u know how to speak in filipino? hahahahah Stranger: Yep why? Stranger: I'm a filipino. Stranger: Hindi kaba sanay? You: hindi HAHAHAHAH You: i bet sanay na sanay ka hahaha Stranger: not. Stranger: Sinasanay ko lang din in terms of talking with others. Stranger: I can communicate with english but im not good at it You: same. im not that fluent tho Stranger: It doesn't matter to me Stranger: As long as i can understand you. You: aww thanks! Stranger: Just a sec You: hindi kasi kami sinanay nung bata kami na mag-english You: u know probinsyana You: okay Stranger: Sone Stranger: Okay na Stranger: Oo naman Stranger: Bakit? Stranger: Mataas expectations ko sa probinsyana kase usually yung mga school sa province ay mataas ang standards Stranger: They are included sa top 10 like dito sa baguio SLU You: oh no.. dont expect too much sakin hahaha Stranger: #1 school sa north Stranger: I see You: yup sister school ng USLT ang SLU Stranger: Sabi na e You: nice guess hahaha Stranger: Maganda daw turo jan e Stranger: Sabi ng kapatid ko You: u mean, maraming petas Stranger: Iba kase standards ng slu Stranger: Petas? You: performance tasks Stranger: Yep You: so sa slu nagaaral kapatid mo? Stranger: Oo Stranger: Pero lilipat siya e gusto niya kase mag dent Stranger: IE tinatake niya right now Stranger: First year college palang naman You: ohh. magkapatid na rin kami by school hahaha You: well, God bless! Stranger: Wala kaseng dent na inooffer ang slu You: ayaw niya bang lumipat sa diff school? Stranger: Lilipat siya You: ay joke hahaha Stranger: So what are you doin rn? You: nakahiga rin Stranger: Sige Stranger: San ba malapit ang tugegarao? You: hmm You: reg 2 siya actually You: cagayan Stranger: Ah okay Stranger: Malayo nga You: 12-hr ride sa bus from tug-mnl Stranger: Malayo nga You: yeppp Stranger: Doble ng baguio Stranger: 5-6 lang mnl to baguio e Stranger: 5-7 You: u have to endure the pain kapag gusto mo magmanila hahahaha Stranger: Oo nakakapagod bumiyahe e Stranger: Body pain + head ache You: true!! Stranger: Have you tried it before? You: many times alr You: nung bata ako Stranger: For what reason? You: bakasyon din Stranger: Ah okay You: may bahay yung tita ko sa qc. dun kami nagsstay Stranger: Kaya pala You: pero tagal na ulit akong di nakapunta sa mnl Stranger: Matraffic sobra Stranger: Tas mainit You: i miss:( pero okay na rin iwas hassle You: oh noo You: kung alam mo lang Stranger: Bakit Stranger: Ano yun You: mas mainit dito sa tugue hahhaha Stranger: Ah grabe pala jan You: like tugue ang pinakamainit na place sa pinas hahahha Stranger: Seriously? You: yess Stranger: I'm not aware about it Stranger: Simula kase nung naging president sa d30 Stranger: Ayoko na ng news You: ohh hahaha. kahit weather report lang? Stranger: I have sa phone You: check mo minsan weather dito hahaha Stranger: So matagal ka ng nagoomegle? Stranger: Wait chrck ko You: lalo na pag summer oh no You: talagang mapapa-Baguio ka sa init hahahaha Stranger: Hahahaha grabe You: hindi naman You: i mean yung sa omegle mong tanong You: triny ko lang recently, u? Stranger: Hindi din Stranger: Matagal ko na siyang alam Stranger: Pero ngayon ko lang ulit na visit You: boredom? hahaha Stranger: Yep You: samee aahhh Stranger: Sleep kana late na You: di pa ako inaantok Stranger: Oh sige You: and i dont have classes naman tom Stranger: What do you want to talk about? You: ikaw if u want to stop na hehe You: just want to say na, nice meeting u!! You: janine btw:) Stranger: Okay lang naman Stranger: James nga pala Stranger: Nice meeting you too You: atleast may nakausap akong matino hays Stranger: Ano lengwahe niyo? Stranger: Ilocano din? You: tagalog, ilocano, ibanag, itawes Stranger: Woah Stranger: Dami ah Stranger: Buti fluent ka sa tagalog? Stranger: Madaming ilocano di marunong magtagalog e haha You: tagalog lang alam ko pero i can understand yung ibang dialects Stranger: Father side ko kase ilocano Stranger: I see Stranger: Bat wala ka pa palang class tom? You: laking tagalog ako eh hahaha Stranger: Kaya pala. You: well according sa school calendar namin, sembreak namin this week Stranger: Same here sa manila ako lumaki You: next week pa class namin Stranger: I see slu din wala pang class e Stranger: Wala tuloy traffic dito Stranger: Nasa bakasyon pa students You: well baka nga wala pa masyadong papasok next week eh hahaha Stranger: Madami bang magagalaan sa tugegarao? Stranger: Depende Stranger: Usually kase pag first week walang sense klase Stranger: Pero syempre lamang ay may alam hahaha Stranger: Ang Stranger: Kaya pumasok ka Stranger: Para aware ka sa mga activities and requirements You: if tuguegarao, may rob na rito kakaopen lang last year and sm downtown Stranger: Ah so okay nadin You: yep. di uso absent sakin hahaha Stranger: Good for you You: pero may caves din na malapit lang Stranger: Anong food yung nirerepresent ng tugue? You: then if u want to go farther, may beaches din You: PANSIT!!! Stranger: Like specialist sila sa food na ano? Stranger: Ow Stranger: Nakakasawa na pansit e hahaha You: no. ibang klase pansit dito no Stranger: What's something in tugue's pancit? You: hmmm. visit ka minsan then youll know hahahha Stranger: Layo You: actually marami nang nagsitayuan ng pansiteria rito. maraming pagpilian hehe You: walang malayo kung gugustuhin ahahaha Stranger: Sabagay Stranger: Zambales gusto ko puntahan e You: batanes naman sakin You: feel ko kasi ang peaceful eh Stranger: Doon solid Stranger: Sobra Stranger: May trust store dun e Stranger: Walang nagtitinfa Stranger: Nagtitinda You: honesty store u mean hahaha Stranger: Yep Stranger: Sorry Stranger: Honesty pala You: it's okayy You: nakapunta ka na?? Stranger: Not yet Stranger: Mahal dun You: yun langg Stranger: Ikaw? You: di pa You: pero soon You: claiming it! Stranger: Nice. Stranger: Dulo ng mapa ng pinas yun e Stranger: Right? Stranger: If im not mistaken You: yep You: hanggang sta. ana lang ako eh Stranger: Di ako familiar dun Stranger: San yun? You: palaui island sa sta ana You: yun palang yung napupuntahan kong nasa dulo ng map hahaha Stranger: Pinakamalayo ko siguro bangui and boracay You: northern part pa rin You: woaaahh Stranger: Sa nothern part bangui You: ilocos Stranger: Yep Stranger: Sa norte Stranger: Almost dulo naden You: sa ilocos naman kami palaging pumupunta Stranger: So you've been there before? You: yessss! Stranger: Nice! You: wait may hindi ako natanong Stranger: Ano yun? You: where did u graduate? Stranger: Feu You: oh nice You: may pinsan akong nag-aral din diyan noon You: med stud Stranger: Graduate naden? You: yup Stranger: Ah okay Stranger: San mo plano mag college? Stranger: Stick with uslt? You: aahhh still dont know yet huhu Stranger: Okay You: may part sakin na gusto ko mag mnl pero may part din na usl Stranger: Kung san mo napupusuan You: wala? hahaha Stranger: Hahaha Stranger: Sad You: wala akong puso hahaha char You: AAHHHH Stranger: Hahaha grabe You: after how many mins nag 'hahaha' ka rin!! Stranger: Bakit? You: wala lang napansin ko lang HAHAHA Stranger: Ay sorry 😂 You: like idk. u seem like a serious guy You: hehe peace Stranger: How did you say so? Stranger: It's okay You: the way u chat siguro? You: pero am i wrong? Stranger: It depends You: hmmm how can i make u laugh hahaha Stranger: Why are you asking me? Stranger: Like that You: whyyy hahaha Stranger: I'm curious You: watt? Stranger: Coz you're asking me how can you make me laugh You: just asking hahaha Stranger: Im curious about it You: is there something wrong? Stranger: Nothing Stranger: You can make me laugh when im comfortable with you You: oh okay. nvm what i said hahahaha Stranger: Hahaha Stranger: Sorry. You: issokayy Stranger: What's your height? You: are u fan of watching movies/series? Stranger: Anime Stranger: And kdrama You: 5'1 You: oo na maliit na ako Stranger: I'm taller than you You: what's your height ba? Stranger: Im scale of 1-5 how can you rate your cuteness? Stranger: 5'4 Stranger: In You: 5.01 You: HAHAHHA Stranger: Ow Stranger: Hahaha Stranger: Means your not cute You: is that accepted Stranger: You're gorg You: i prefer cute tho Stranger: Alright You: sooo back to moviess You: why not You: why anime Stranger: So what about movies? Stranger: It's cool and i felt like I'm turning a child again Stranger: I just want to watch those animes that I've had seen in tv before but I can't watch because i need to go to school Stranger: You know how sad it is when you want to watch but you have to go to school hahaha You: im not a fan of anime but i watched some and it was gooddddd You: trueeee Stranger: Im not fan of anime too You: btw my fave is kimi no na wa!! Stranger: But i enjoyed watching anime. Stranger: Not familiar with her You: oh nooo watch it!!! You: it's an anime movie Stranger: I will. Stranger: Hey do you want to continue this? Stranger: You have viber or what? So we can talk somtime? You: i dont have one. sira yung phone ko sadt:( but i have twitter meh Stranger: I do not have twitter Stranger: It's okay Stranger: Malay mo naman one day we'll meet again here Stranger: What type of movies do you like? Stranger: What's your favorite movie? You: what else do u have ba? Stranger: Wala na e You: hmm anything Stranger: Fb and messenger is too personal You: fav movie? idk hahahaa Stranger: All i have is viber Stranger: Pang tawag kay mama at papa Stranger: Then pag mag nagustuhan akong kausap dito Stranger: We continue there You: well may phone naman dito na di ginagamit pero walang viber You: maybe i can install nalang Stranger: You sure Stranger: Baka hassle sayo You: di naman. may viber ako dati You: ewan ko kung pwede pa pero yun pa rin naman number na ginagamit ko Stranger has disconnected.
Ang Aklatan: claims it's "new" scripture that compliments the BoM
EDIT: added tl;dr I remember reading about this first here on reddit but I didn't see much response. Anyways, there's a book from the Philippines called Ang Aklatan ("the books") that is claimed by one blog to be a companion to the Book of Mormon and by another website to be essentially irreligious but highly spiritual and important to the national destiny of the Philippines. Interestingly enough, its other main message is that it records the visit of Christ to the Philippines and it was translated off copper plates. The Laguna Copperplate Inscription it mentions is real but the connection the website makes to the LCI is doubtful. It also claims to include prophecies about Magellan, the two World Wars, and September 11th. In full disclosure, the reason this is interesting is because I served in the Philippines. Area leaders and missionaries always framed our progress as fulfillment of promises to the "isles of the sea", which Ang Aklatan also mentions. A few things stand out to me that make me conflicted but leaning towards being very skeptical: Kingdom of Maharlika A main point of the book is the idea that the Philippines is a land set apart by Christ Himself to be a prosperous land in the future. I have two issues with this. One, "maharlika" refers to both a sort of pre-Hispanic Tagalog warrior class and a term that dictator Ferdinand Marcos used to push nationalism identified with his personality cult, even referring to himself as a maharlika who (allegedly) waged guerrilla warfare against the Japanese. There's no precedent for a Filipino kingdom or nation called Maharlika, neither is there a particular linguistic reason to do so. They may as well call the UK the Kingdom of Knights or Japan the Kingdom of Samurai, based on the term's meaning and societal rank. Second, it's oh-so-convenient that this book -- which claims to be around two thousand years old, translated around 20 years ago, and published in the last few years -- connects the much-disputed Spratly Islands with national borders supposedly established by Christ Himself, as if to give Filipinos divine justification to claim them (or at least have the US Navy do it for them). A Wild Seventy Appears The anonymous author states that after a meeting with their bishop which didn't go their way at all, an also-anonymous Seventy met with them and reported several things:
that President Monson has read the book and that the other GAs were well aware of it
more confirmation of the book as playing an important part in the Philippines' national destiny
that the book was a preparatory step for mass conversion in the Philippines and the opening of China
that the book itself would destroy anti-Mormon arguments and bring many non-Filipinos to the truth
the Church has to deny the book for now in order to not interfere with its purposes, whatever those may be
The fact that all this was reported anonymously and only on blogs and twoLDS-related forums makes me skeptical. Even though we know of instances where Joseph Smith said he was commanded to wait on revealing things, like his own Plates, but this one doesn't feel right for more reasons. Scheduled Revelations Though the website claims that the entire book has been translated since 1987, it also talks about the rest of the books as constituting sort of a sealed section that will be unsealed when specific benchmarks are met. Think canonical Kickstarter, only with new books instead of an autographed CD. They also accept donations for temple paraphernalia. Colonization The website also calls for Filipinos in certain countries to relocate en masse to smaller communities. This seems like what Brigham Young did in reverse, and the only mention I can find of this "call to gather" is on that one website. Though I guess I shouldn't be too surprised, since their Facebook page is only followed by 3441 people, none of whom are to be seen commenting about "the big move". Without actually reading the book, I'm limited in what else I can say about it. However, there are large portions online and the second edition is for sale on Lulu (based on the new material added, I'm assuming this means they've already had "a large gathering of believers" and "a great number of men" travelling to preach about it). I'm not really sure what to think about it, so I've decided to remain skeptical until I can analyze the book in detail (too bad I don't have access to the original language version) and see what you guys think about all this. It's certainly interesting and if the most I can ever say about it is that it's an intriguing hoax, then I guess that's good enough for me. At least I'll have "received these things and pondered them in my heart". tl;dr: either Ang Aklatan is a hoax and similarities to the coming forth of the BoM are intentionally designed to make Mormons take it seriously, or it's true and the similarities are still intentional but divine. I haven't made up my mind yet.
I don’t know how long it will take you, but one day when you see this, take twenty minutes to gain years worth of motivation, from me to you:
Hi there. My name is Leeland and this is going to be quite a story. I will be hyper linking things here and there- so you may want to read through once before getting distracted on these tangents. As stated in the original title - things at home were rough:
No running water till I left home- A lot of people will ask if I am American at this point, but you'd be surprised at how often families in the south have a well they can't afford to fix. My childhood went by in blissful ignorance. We bathed one-two-three times a month in the Lake Shower stalls, washed our clothes by hand, and bought water or filled empty milk jugs in bathrooms at Walmart.
I like to interject humor in dark places so the reading isn't dry and hopeless- so if you just want the meat of the story skip the next two paragraphs-
My most embarrassing moment was my 10th grade year in high school. Like most impoverished families- we had an absurd amount of dogs and cats. The cats are outside cats. One morning before school as I was about to run up the long rocky path to my bus stop, I saw a tom cat marking his territory on my bike. Indignant, I kicked at him. (not violently mind you) Little did I know I'd taken the bike's place. The bus stop, being outdoors meant plenty of air circulation, which meant I didn't know I was doomed until I got onto the bus. The moment I sat down, the most pungent smell hit my nose. I realized within a few minutes of blowing it away from me and it returning that it was my pants that smelled of cat piss. Although I was not sitting with the other children, the smell filled the entire bus and it was't hard, I imagine to determine its source given the few students we picked up after me. I managed to bluff my way through 3 periods that day. In between each class I went to the bathroom trying to wash out the acrid smell. It ofcourse didn't work. I only managed to draw curious stares from people at the wet mark on my pants in the halls. Some may ask why I didn't bother to call family and ask for new pants, but you must remember- we are poor. When I turned 16 we didn't even use gas to teach me how to drive- much less would we be willing to spend gas on bringing someone pants. Plus my step dad......well. We'll get back to that. It was in 4th period, just after lunch that my teacher walked into the classroom. I was sitting toward the back, at a table shared with 3 others. The very moment he crossed the threshold he stopped, wrinkled his nose and proclaimed loudly: "Ugh. What's that smell? It smells....like a cat's liter box.." And pray tell, does my dear sweet Arts and Humanities teacher stop there? Oh no. He literally follows his nose to my table- where he stands in front of me and my 3 classmates, looking out past us. "it's coming from here...." It must have been at that point that he realized he was about the end someone's social life, because he dropped it quite promptly there. It was the most awkward moment I have ever had. Now let us continue
I had an abusive life. Let me first state here that my mother is a good woman- with unfortunately poor taste in men. My biological father is a dead beat I've only ever met once. My first step father turned out to be a liar and a child molester. Though we got rid of him early on- it messed my little brother (his real father) up psychologically- and he had to go to counselling for 3 years. Apparently I was molested as well, but I have no memory of it. Thank God. I got 1 brother and 1 sister in that short marriage. The 3rd and final 'father figure' in our home was a man who lived with his mother well into his 30's. We moved in with them, as my mother had no place to go. So realize here and now before you judge her too harshly- that if we left this place- finding a new place to live we could afford would be very difficult. Especially as a single mother who has 3 children.
The first few years were OK. But something changed as I turned 9 and then on, to this day I don't really understand it. Maybe he was always this way, but my innocent years shielded me from his ignorance. Being the spiteful man that he was- my step father would often accuse me of this or that. And truthfully- I was 95% of the time innocent of these accusations. Ofcourse I would deny them, but it's his word against mine. Often I would be given an ultimatum; "I'm not going to tell you what you did, because you always lie about it anyways, if you admit to what you did wrong, I will not punish you as badly, but if you lie I will make your punishment worse" Ofcourse I proclaimed innocence. And I paid for it dearly. He would practice 3 types of punishment. All of them included me being out of sight and mind for hours:
pull your pants down, remain bent over the couch (living room where everyone who walks by will see you) until I come to spank you. Sometimes I would be there for hours, scared of the lashes I didn't deserve. It was terror at first, humiliation hours later.
Stand in the corner of the cabinet that hasn't been dusted behind in literally 10 years where you can hardly breathe without getting dust in your lungs until I conveniently forget your there. I once stood in the corner for 6 hours.
You're grounded. This was the punishment I received most often. Being grounded at my home is basically a death sentence. You literally have less rights than a prisoner on death row. I lay in my bed (if you can call it that, thing was so old the fabric had been worn away years ago and I either choose to use the blanket for warmth or use it to protect my side against the springs that stuck out painfully.) until told my time was up. I cannot speak. I cannot read. I cannot even turn over because my 'room' was actually the living room where the TV was and by turning over I would be watching TV so if caught doing so I would be smacked in the face. I had to stay on my side, looking at the same peeling wall paper.....for up to two weeks at a time. I would be grounded so often that I began to notice patterns. If I was not told to get up the morning following my sentence, then I was going to spend at least 2 days, if not 2 than 4, if not 4 then 7. If I ever made it to an 8th day- I gave way to despair knowing that it would be another 6 days.
I tell you the truth, there is nothing in this world more depressing than knowing you've wasted your entire day, and that no matter what, when you wake up the next day, there is NOTHING to look forward to This was the closest I ever came to depression as a child and teen.
Have you ever seen hoarders? My step father's mother was the last surviving member of her 9 brothers and sisters. She couldn't bare to part with anything, and I can't really blame her, but being as poor as we were, it was cheaper to keep all of these things in the house, rather than put them in storage. Trying to make a 2 person home accommodate 7 people was bad enough. Imagine curtains crusted over with years of neglect and dust, boxes pile to ceiling tiles, which by the way were constantly falling and in need of repair. No matter my age I was very seldom ever allowed to leave the yard or house. We were never given any independence. Never allowed to cook our own food, to call friends, to visit friends or have friends over. These terrible circumstances created in me a very curious cocktail of Social Awkwardness. More on that soon.
Thankyou for the private messages and the comments on this post. The feedback affirms my decision to share, in hopes that my story will help someone out there struggling.
In addition to an aggressive step father, claustrophobic living conditions, a yearning for independence as I grew and a lack of basic resources that most people take for granted, our family also did without often.
For me- three meals a day was a foreign concept. I had 1 bowl of cereal for breakfast, and a bologna sandwich with a handful of lays chips for dinner. Without exaggeration that was almost entirely my diet growing up. Even when I entered my teens, a time for males where a lot of important growing occurs, I was severely underweight. Up until last year in fact, at the age of 24, I was 140 pounds....at 6'2. Money was rough not only because of the size of our family, (step father, Mother, step grandmother, 2 sisters and 1 brother + me + numerous animals that we had no business keeping the first place) money was an issue because my step father refused to work. My mother ended up becoming a truck driver so we could afford to pay for life's many needs, and this meant she was home rarely. This also meant that I had to endure more hardship without my mother who was often my only shield against the injustices I had to suffer. One of my most cherished memories of this time was at 15 years old. Grounded. Mom came home after two weeks on the road in the middle of the day. It had been dark in the living room all day. When she opened the door light flooded in and for a brief moment I felt free. Seeing me in the bed she knew immediately that I got into trouble again, but whether it was my fault or not, she knelt beside me, wiping the tears from my eyes. She told me; "*One day we'll leave this place Leeland, just put up with it a little longer I promise you." One day turned into years though, because when you're poor and have always been poor, and your parents before you and those before them were poor, life like this becomes a cycle. At 17 I was becoming a man. I was beginning to open my eyes and see the way other people my age lived. I was consumed with bitterness. SIDENOTEI also masked that bitterness quite well. I was President of the Writing club and Vice President of the Arts Honors Society, not a single friend at school knew what I suffered at home. Why do I have to deal with this? How do I escape? The truth is I had been offered a way out two years ago. (15) Let me tell you about Miss Billy Sue Kibbons. The following is an excerpt from a Facebook note I made a few years ago:
*"I want to be an artist" The boy had decided this with absolute certainty and naivety at the tender age of 8. It would be many years before he realized that 'artist' was too broad a term, that he still had much to learn, and that he had no idea what he was getting himself into. All he knew about the world of art at that time was Bob Ross and the Cabin that an ancient woman taught him in once a week. Billy Sue was her name and Leeland, even at his young age, thought that to be an odd name for a woman. It might have been a stroke of luck, fate, destiny or whatever you believe in that brought the two of them together, but Billy Sue would say it was God, in His infinite wisdom. That might have been the intention of the Teacher from Leeland's Elementary school who anonymously sponsored him to take these after school art lessons with Billy Sue. Even 14 years later to the time that Leeland was writing these words he never knew the Teacher's identity. This left him with no one to thank and he worked all the harder in hopes that this Teacher would one day hear of his success and know that she had made a difference. Years down the road Leeland would speculate just why he had been sponsored, knowing that while he was talented, he was no prodigy. Billy Sue taught Leeland many things about art, but none of that would have saved him the way only she and her husband, Jerry could. When Leeland had spent 5 months with Billy Sue she began taking him to church with her. Leeland found Christ not long afterward. (I do apologize is the C word offends anyone, this is not me shoving religion down your throat, this is just part of my journey) When Leeland was 10 years old he got his first allowance ever, working in Jerry's yard. Over the next 7 years he would learn neat landscaping techniques, the names of flowers and how to care for a lawnmower. These things are not meaningful to a normal child, but for Leeland, who grew up in a home that stifled independence and most learning, any excuse to get out of the house was treasured. Jerry and Billy Sue Kibbons provided Leeland with 2 days out of the week that he could leave the house. During Summer and Winter breaks this was most always the only time he would have outside his home.*
As you can see- these two people made an exceptional change in my life, and of all her students, I was the only one Mrs. Kibbons took such a special interest in. My tutor was very aware of my circumstances at home. I begged her not to call child services. I loved my mother, though she would constantly disprove of the way my mom raised me and the poor choices she sometimes made. When I was 15, she and her husband sat me down after a long day of landscaping and let me know- that if I were willing- they would allow me to move in with them. They just wanted to give me a stable environment at this crucial part of my high school life. I should have accepted. But when you are poor, and suddenly very aware of how poor you are- sometimes there is guilt associated with accepting help, even from those you know love you. And so I endured another 2 years of consistent abuse at home. My mother had been arguing with my step father a lot around this time. Mostly about me and how to appropriately deal with me. She had convinced him to at least put me to work doing chores, instead of wasting my time away in a bed for weeks at a time. I should have been grateful for such a break through, but wouldn't you know, he intended to take full advantage of this new rule. There are two examples of this type of punishment:
Many parts of our large yard were overgrown with baby Chestnut Oak trees. They have very long roots. Most of our soil was comprised of clay. My job? Pull up over 1,000 baby trees, bare handed, without tools until I was allowed to go to sleep. This punishment lasted the entire evening. I wept with anger that night at the injustice. I screamed at the top of my lungs at God, the fates, whatever. I was getting sick of my circumstances and my long long long long oh so long fuse was nearing it's end.
One day my step father walks into the house. Over many years of bad experiences with him coming home- I'd learned to shrink away into non existence in his presence in hopes that I would go unnoticed and unprovoked. I was not so lucky this day:
He came home. The first thing he says as I turn to my name being called: "You're being punished. I don't need to tell you why, you already know what you did. You know all that trash (please note this is a picture taken several years after the fact, the trash you're about to learn about was much much MUCH more) that's been piling up outside? The recycle center is giving everyone 3 days to throw out their trash for free. Get to work." Since we're poor, we burn our trash. Many things cannot be burned or are unsafe to burn. Examples include air freshener cans, glass, tin, copper, aluminum cans, etc etc. Ever since I could remember we'd never moved those trash piles. Easily 12+ years of garbage was piled at the burn pile and behind/beside the milkhouse (this picture shows what it looked like after I cleared all the trash. The rusty freezer was full of mosquito infested water and broken glass and rusty metals, imagine 6 of those full, that's how much garbage was piled around the milkhouse, and that was not even half of the total garbage.) My job was to bare handed, and with no help or tools, sort through all our accumulated garbage, sort it into 3 piles and then bag it (not double bag, safer for me and more expensive for him). After I bagged the extremely sharp glass and various other items, I had to wrap my hands around each bag for fear that it would split and then I'd be in trouble for wasting bags- and waddle the bag across the yard, up a hill, and up the long rocky drive way to a single care trailer. We all know how long one of those is right? I had to pile big black trash bags from end to end, 3 stacks high before I finally finished. Keep in mind it's the middle of the summer in the South. Snakes, venomous spiders, wasp and yellow jacket nests are very very real dangers when going through so much garbage that has been undisturbed for years. The entire time I am working, from morning to after it got too dark to see, he was verbally abusing me for 'taking my sweet time' as he saw it in his eyes. He assumed I wanted him to be late for the deadline. Paranoid, this guy. When I finally finished my work, more than 8 hours before the deadline, he was not home. He was at a friend's house, helping them with THEIR garbage. He comes home 6 hours later, takes the garbage off without a word, and when he returns later that night.... He still has the garbage. So what does he say to me? "I know you were taking your time with this punishment. Because of you I was late and couldn't take the trash off. Later I'm going to make you unload all the garbage off the trailer. For now I have to think of an appropriate way to punish you for making me late. Until I think of a punishment, you're going to lay in bed." These thoughts passed through my mind very quickly, please pardon the language:
Not only did I work my ass off for 3 fucking days. I did it all on the made up accusation that I did something wrong.
Not only did I do time for something I was likely innocent of, but this bastard harassed me the entire time I worked and then when I finally finish my job on time he has the nerve to blame me for his poor time management.
On top of ALL this- he's not only going to punish me for his mistakes, he's going to make me lay in the bed, suffering more, all the while looking forward to yet another punishment.
...... ..... .... "No." Step father turns around, after walking off expecting me to blindly obey as I always have. "What did you say??" I stand up. "I have the right to know what I did wrong in the first place to earn all of these punishments. This isn't fair." By this time my voice is shaking. I'm a very thin kid* (* I'm the one in blue.*) He's not quite as tall as me, but he is much stronger and better fed than me. For those interested, this is me today* But I'd had enough. So many years of injustice. I felt like Harry Potty finally giving the Dursely's a piece of my mind. He walked toward me. I held my ground. I'm 17. Nearly a man grown. It's time to make myself heard right? "You will do as your told. I do not have to explain myself to you. You always deny the things you do, it's a waste of my time!" "Well what about my time? Why should I give you so many days of my life for something I didn't even do? If I actually did something wrong then you can explain it to me. I won't budge from this spot until you TELL ME." I said those last two words forcefully. Not out of disrespect, but as a testament to my resolve. My step father has always been a hothead. He grabbed me by the shoulder and forced me outside. I wasn't wearing anything except gym shorts and my glasses. He shoves me outside. Every step he took put his face within inches of mine as he yelled at me: "I can't ever trust you, you're always lying..." etc etc (multiple curse words, but there's little point in elaborating.)
It's important to note that to this day I am unsure of what to make of the man. Part of me believes he was actually stupid enough to believe he was in the right. That's doesn't make it OK- but it makes it harder to loath him.
Up the side walk we go, he finally let's his rage come to a boil and instead of just yelling, now he's screaming at me to hit him. He wants an excuse to 'defend himself'- but I'm not quite that stupid. Even if I wanted to hit him, I don't have a violent bone in my body. I hate confrontation. I try to solve my problems with passionate speech, because I believe in the power of words. They held no power for me this day. Eventually he tries to goad me by attacking my beliefs. At this time he does not believe in a god, and while he's never said anything about my Sunday school lessons, this time he makes it known what a hypocrite he takes me for. "YOU CALL YOURSELF A CHRISTIAN, BUT YOU ALWAYS LIE, I CAN'T EVER TRUST A SINGLE WORD YOU SA-" For the first time in my life, I pulled a Gohan and yelled at him. "YOU DON'T KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT ME" I leaned forward as I yelled this. I made sure he could see the frustration and pent up rage in my eyes. He smacked my face. Hard. Glasses came off. They lay on the gravel mangled. Without even a brief pause, I turned from him, and from that life. Without shoes, or a shirt or even decent eye sight I walked away. Hot tears fell down my cheeks, and I don't even remember what he said. It was particularly offensive and I yell at him again without turning around: "FUCK YOU!" Things start to get better Knowing that if I didn't get off the road soon he was going to try to force me to come back home, I walked to the Youth Pastors house which was close by. I knocked on the door. He opened it to see a skinny, bare backed, barefoot teen crying uncontrollably that he'd sometimes played basketball with, with a huge red welt on his face. I looked at him through teary eyes hardly daring to think about the life altering decision I was making and asked to make a call. Mrs. Kibbons was there to pick me up within the hour. My mother was very upset for a few weeks after that. But she eventually came to terms with my moving out. Mr. and Mrs. Kibbons helped prepare me for College. I got into Campbellsville University where I got to meet and become friends with people from all over the world. (CU offers big scholarships for international students) For the first time in my life I was able to socialize with people freely, and I was able to commit to events, knowing that if I could get there myself- no one could tell me no. The independence was beautiful. Life was looking up for once. I thought. I was wrong. Sometimes the road to success is riddled with potholes. After 2 years and Campbellsville University I decided to transfer to IADT in Chicago. I intended to major in Animation, & CU only offered Fine Art. It was my first time in the big city. I enjoyed the city itself very very much When I transferred to IADT, I was told that with my 2 years of gen ed courses, I would be able to finish my Associates in Animation within 2 more years at IADT. After an entire year at IADT I had still not taken a single course for animation. Here I am, 3 years into my degree, and I don't know a thing about what I want to do for the rest of my life. I spoke to my program director out of frustration and concern. I was told then what I should have been told before enrolling at IADT:
Enrollment is at an all time low. The core classes you need to be in are not filling up. Until we can fill the classes >you need to take- you can't take them.
That's fine I guess, but here's the worm in my apple: My financial aid, scholarships and grants were not enough to cover tuition AND my student housing. If I wanted to use the student housing provided by the school (much cheaper than anything else) I would have to take out a parent plus loan. Fine. Do what you gotta do right? It gets worse. I need class X, Y and Z. They are not available this semester, so if I am to remain a full time student, aka, still qualify for the parent plus loan, which is the only way I am able to survive at this point, then I have to take more classes. I ended up enrolling in Drawing I. I already had this credit from my time at CU. I sat through an entire semester of remedial drawing for the chance to do their amateur animation final. It was styled in the way of William Kentridge, where you animate using charcoal and a camera and one sheet of paper. Our requirements were 50 frames, 2 objects needed to move, at least 2.5 seconds in duration and could be of anything. I decided to take this project seriously. This was going to be my first experience with animation, if I didn't give it everything- how would I know if I was going to enjoy it? We were given two weeks. We had a cramped classroom where we were expected to work shoulder to shoulder with other students, where the possibility of our tripods being budged, thus making the animation shakey and low quality was too common. I rejected this. I took my work to the cafeteria and worked all day and into the night. I marked my place with tape and continued everyday to learn this style. I didn't make my goal. My animation ended several hundred frames short of my goal. I expected everyone to go above and beyond the 50 frame limit. When I came to the final to present, I was astounded to see stick man animations crudely done. I do not mean to make my classmates sound bad- but you could tell, this is not what they wanted to do for the rest of their lives. I submitted an animation roughly 8-14 seconds long, with around 500 frames:
I knew then that this is what I want to do for the rest of my life. I was ready to commit many more years if it meant I could learn to be great. My mother's credit took a hit. Suddenly she could no longer take out the Parent Plus loan for me. I was evicted from student housing. An illegal Mexican family took me in. (I went to school with their son) Video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RupGqS7oFqY I lived in 3 different places that last year of college. I wish I could say I rose above these challenges and graduated. But suddenly I had rent to pay and I had to do it on minimum part time wage- Suddenly I was forced to commute 90 minutes in extreme weather to school and to work. The stress began to pile up, my grades crumbled under the weight. I was placed on academic probation for a semester. Then my grandmother fell terminally ill. She'd kept it a secret. Suddenly I find out she's road tripping from her home in Arizona to be with her daughter and grandchildren before the end. I was faced with a difficult decision. Finish my degree and miss my chance to be with my grandmother who could die any week, or take a semester off? I was with her when she died. I do not regret it. She like my mother made many mistakes in her life, but she always loved me, and I her. While I was away from school, my institute announced that they would be merging with Sanford Brown Not only did they lose accreditation, and would be dropping animation as a major, but they would also be closing their Chicago location once their current students graduated. I could finish my degree and graduate from a school that no longer exists.... or I could cut my losses. A Year to Think When I left for Chicago my mother finally worked up the courage to leave her relationship. She once said to me over the phone that it was not until I left for Chicago that she realized I had grown up. She had always reasoned with herself that by staying with him, she could save up enough money to give us the childhood we deserved. She decided to save what was left of her two daughters childhoods. And so it was that I decided to stay in Tennessee with my mom for a year, to work a few jobs, save some money and help out where I could. I was very concerned with my art practice and worried that this year off from school would come back to bite me. I looked for internships, but everything that had to do with animation requires that I be enrolled in school, even though I was willing to work for free if it meant finally learning.
I took to sitting at bus stops next to stop lights and practicing speed drawing by attempting to draw as much of a car or cars as I could before the lights turned green.
I also networked a lot. Working the drive through of a McDonalds and the carry out of a Papa Murphy's I met hundreds of people every week. I was amiable and looked for opportunities to let important facts about myself slip in hopes that someone, sometime would bite. One day a lady found out how much I loved art and recommended me to a tutor she went to weekly.
An art tutor? Heh, I have not had one of those for a long time, this could be a real treat. Understatement of the year. Turned out my Art tutor was none other than Marion Cook the father of Barry Cook who co-directed Walt Disney's Mulan in 1998. As you read these words I cannot begin to guess at what each of you are passionate about, but for me, pen on paper is my outlet. Be it words or lines- the ability to communicate is my greatest treasure. When I studied under Mr. Cook I saw dexterity of the hand, the likes of which you will rarely see in life and only when you know to look for it. He was so incredible it moved me to tears. Finally. I had a Master to teach me. I felt like Ang from Avatar, the Last Airbender. I can finally become GREAT. I was wrong. Again. I love my mother, as I have told you a few times, but she often makes decisions I disagree with. She was never very strict with my sisters, and much less so the youngest, as it is often the case with the babies of the family. My little sister was caught selling weed to the landlord's son.....by the landlord. (Please note I do not judge anyone that smokes, it's your life, I simply choose to not do such things) We were evicted. We had 30 days to find a new place to live. My other sister was in college and my brother was married a while ago and lives with his wife. So My mom found a place for herself and my youngest sister, but wouldn't you know it? There was no room for me. (new Boyfriend) I had to come up with a plan. I've always been a person to dream big and when I dream big I put my mind to it. I decided I was going to California. The animation Capital of the United States. I started a gofundme, told my predicament and included a short animation. No I will not link it, I did not create this post to panhandle I raised $2,000 in 1 month. Through a game called League of Legends I hit up a friend of mine in the Marines I'd known online for several years, though never in real life. He gave me the keys to his empty apartment and gave me 6 months of a rent free, bill free existence to get myself set up until he was deployed to Okinawa. I worked all sorts of jobs in my first year here. (San Diego) From Target to 7-11, from Telemarketer to Inrest Marketer, from Art tutor on a Military base to King of the Carryout at a Dominos. No job I came to learn, was too humble for me to work. Income is income. There's never an excuse to not be making money. I even got the balls to design a fancy resume in Ai, custom business cards and drew up a nice cover letter, and took myself door to door trying to find more work. The goal here was not to find a great job, that would have been an unexpected bonus. The goal was to build self confidence and build up a resistance to rejection. As a telemarketer I came up with a unique formula for networking. Most people told me to go die in a hole. Understandable, but once every few hundred calls a person would be astoundingly polite- I would ofcourse, without even being asked, place them on the DNC (national do not call list) Then after hours, I would call them back, inform them that I took the liberty of making sure my company could never disturb then again, then I coached them on how to avoid these calls in the future. Only then, if they were willing, did I venture to introduce myself and talk about my goals in California. I had very many interesting conversations with complete strangers. Most of them ended in empty hands but a heart full of affirmations. One call ended up changing my life. I had the fortune of grabbing the ear of someone who once owned a decently sized tech company in SoCal. He sold it ages ago, and now makes apps in his spare time. He discerned a bit about me in our phone call and asked me to lunch. Being the very trusting person I am thanks to a childhood of false accusations I agreed. The subject of competitive gaming came up during our conversation and he asked me why I didn't stream for additional revenue. I confessed I'd always wanted to, but with my background I'd never had that kind of chance. He asked me to send him a list of what I would need to stream. I sent him the cheapest list I could. He upgraded everything and Amazon'd me the parts. The only catch he said, was that I had to put my computer together myself. I learned a lot about computers that night. I began my stream with the knowledge that the average streamer gets 1,000-3,000 unique views and 100-250 follows in their first 12 months. I set my 12 month goal for 100,000 views and 2,000 follows. Today marks day 212 (month 7) and my stream is at 57,000 views and 2,400 follows. I do not use those number to brag, but to make a point. People put a lot of stock into averages. What are averages guys? It's the culmination of many many people's stats. Many people, but not you. Who you are, and what you can do is dependent only upon the amount effort you're willing to give. How BAD do you want it? When I worked my summer job on base as an art tutor, I worked 40 hour weeks there. I would walk 4 miles home in the Cali sun, shower, and walk to Dominos to work. When I got home I streamed for 5 hours every night with the goal of obtaining 10 follows a day. I treated my stream like a 3rd job. You've got to become obsessed with the idea of being successful. Pic Related What am I doing today? Currently I am looking for a second job. I am just barely self sustaining. This means I make enough money monthly to stay caught up on bills and pay for food. Never be satisfied for such things. I certainly am not. I'm working on my very first short film in spare time. Literally working on storyboards every week:
My mother was 17 when she held me in her arms thinking That this is the only one in the world that loves me. Oh My mother was young once too But her dreams did not come true and now as she watches me grow she sits and thinks on the things she hopes I will know "Oh son" she sighed, "your father never knew.. though living in the moment is never hard to do, after taking a chance you've got to follow through... cuz' Love is so much more than a heart that just won't mind, Every line being redrawn and crossed everytime.." Oh mother you've taught me so many things I've listened to your heart and the sad song it sings Fall far, far from the tree, that's what my mother Sang to me..
My fervent desire is to finish this in time for mother's day, or father's day if a devious mood takes me. There is a lot, that I do not know about Animation. I am able to teach myself some things, but I learned early on, that I learn best with a patient teacher with whom I can constantly ask questions. I need one of those the most. I'm currently trying to learn to drive. Transportation has been a major problem in my life, and at 25, I can no longer blame circumstance for having put it off for so long. The point of this post wasn't to give you the underdog story of how I magically became super successful, it was to show you that despite so many setbacks, and I only told you about half of them- I keep moving forward. Remember Rocky.
It's not about how hard you can hit, it's about how hard you can get hit, and keep moving forward, how >much you can take, and keep moving forward, that's how winning is done!
What can be more inspirational than a story about someone's life struggles, and how despite it all they still have the balls to look life in the eye and ask for more? I'm right there with you guys, never quit, never give up. Some people have pm'd me to ask what I'm good at- So I will shamelessly plug myself for a moment:
Graphic Design
Art tutoring
English Tutoring
Writing (creatively)
Public Speaking
Customer Relation/Service (even at the carryout of a Dominos, I average $5-$20 in tips a day because I own it. I know how to make the customer smile, and I reject the overused jargon my coworkers spout. I even take the time to learn conversational Hindi, Mandarin, Vietnamese, Spanish and Tagalog in an effort to connect with the many different cultures represented here in Mira Mesa.
Reddit's 40,000 character limit bugged Here is the rest of the post in the comment section I don't know what you guys are facing, but it begins one day at a time.
The best time to plant a tree was a hundred years ago- old African proverb
/end This was a pleasure typing out. If you'd like to get to know me- that can be done so here
Anonymous : for assignments po thank you po sa mga makakasagot Anonymous : Ayshe nuwang , ano po meaning niyan sa tagalog? Anonymous : Ayshe nuwang ayshe kasal Anonymous : nya ibaloi ti maganda ang mga pilipina Dan : @micmic : "sad to remember" = "ensahit shi dikna ja nemnemnemen" @Anonymous : Eg ka la nandako nem,kami menccsked = "di ka na nagbenta pero kami'y naghihintay" anonymous meaning. Tagalog. hindi kilalang kahulugan. Last Update: 2020-05-20. Usage Frequency: 1. Quality: Excellent. Reference: Anonymous. English. Anonymous. 1 decade ago. yes father / yes dad. oo is yes but you can also use. opo=polite or with respect, used when speaking to people older than you or if youre trying to be cute (teenager) 0 0. ... the tagalog "oo" means "yes", but you use "opo" to answer 'yes' to older people. 1 0. Contextual translation of "chupapi means" into Tagalog. Human translations with examples: español, maligtas, i love you, bahog bilat, bobo ka tanga, maligo ka macoy. Here are some tagalog words that I know that have double meanings: Mani - a delicious kind of nut but some people take this word as a part of a woman's anatomy. Itlog - just like an ordinary egg but people who have dirty minds.. nah i don't wanna say it. Anonymous. Anonymous asked in Society & Culture Languages · 1 decade ago. What does borat mean in Tagalog? I thought it ... you will be surprised cause this word has meaning in tagalog.ok in bikol dialect related to tagalog, this means drunk, while in tagalog this means head of the penis! 1 0. How do you think about the answers? You ... Pertaining to a process or content that is not associated with an identifiable user or originator. Setting up a chautara is an act of kindness, and most of the benefactors remain anonymous. Ang paglalaan ng chautara ay isang gawa ng kabaitan, at karamihan sa mga nagmagandang-loob ay nananatiling di - kilala. Anonymous. Anonymous asked in Society & Culture Languages · 10 years ago. ... 10 years ago. Favourite answer. masanting means beautiful. masanting ka ..... you're beautiful. in tagalog: From: Machine Translation MyMemory is the world's largest Translation Memory. Usage Frequency: 1 </p> <p>Today, it could refer to any person or a thing that causes trouble. </p> <p>Do keep in mind, however, there are various dialects and languages throughout the nation. Suriin ang mga pagsasalin ng access 'sa Tagalog. Tingnan ang mga halimbawa ng pagsasalin access sa mga pangungusap, makinig sa pagbigkas at alamin ang gramatika.
These Events Will Happen in Asia in 2020 (part 2) - YouTube
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